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There were four million people in the American Colonies and we had Jefferson and Franklin. Now we have over 200 million and the two top guys are Clinton and Dole. What can you draw from this? Darwin was wrong.

Mort Sahl

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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
People
Guys
Colonies
Clinton
Jefferson
Millions
Darwin
Four
Colony
Guy
Franklin
Wrong
Draw
American
Draws
Two
Million
Dole

More quotes by Mort Sahl

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If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?
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The distance between taking social action and having the knowledge is as wide as the mouth of the Mississippi.
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Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they deserve everything they've stolen.
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A Yuppie is someone who believes it's courageous to eat in a restaurant that hasn't been reviewed yet.
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New book on Malcolm X says we don't know how he was killed. Want to bring in the FBI. Maybe they were in already.
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If you were the only person left on the planet, I would have to attack you. That's my job.
Mort Sahl
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I watched Ken Burns' Civil War series on PBS. My favorite segment is when Bob Hope entertains the troops at Gettysburg.
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I'm for capital punishment. You've got to execute people. How else are they going to learn?
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You haven't lived until you've died in California
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Obama is running again for spite.
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Every time the Russians throw an American in jail, the Committee throws an American in jail to get even.
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I never met a man I didn't like until I met Will Rogers.
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We all know that America is the worst country in the world, except for all the others.
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I'm not a liberal, I'm a radical!
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There's a danger our fiscal bankruptcy might overtake our moral bankruptcy.
Mort Sahl
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That feeling of hopelessness only serves your masters.
Mort Sahl
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A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now.
Mort Sahl
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If someone were to ask me for a short cut to sensuality, I would suggest he go shopping for a used 427 Shelby-Cobra. But it is only fair to warn you that of the 300 guys who switched to them in 1966, only two went back to women.
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My whole life is a movie. It's just that there are no dissolves. I have to live every agonizing moment of it. My life needs editing.
Mort Sahl
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I don't think crucifixion is the answer. I believe in the resurrection. I like that part of the story.
Mort Sahl