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There were four million people in the American Colonies and we had Jefferson and Franklin. Now we have over 200 million and the two top guys are Clinton and Dole. What can you draw from this? Darwin was wrong.

Mort Sahl

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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Four
Colony
Guy
Franklin
Wrong
Draw
American
Draws
Dole
Two
Million
Colonies
People
Guys
Jefferson
Clinton
Millions
Darwin

More quotes by Mort Sahl

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Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. If he ran unopposed he would have lost.
Mort Sahl
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Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they deserve everything they've stolen.
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I'm for capital punishment. You've got to execute people. How else are they going to learn?
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We would have broken up except for the children. Who were the children? Well, she and I were.
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Obama says his recreation consists of reading the Constitution... looking for a loophole.
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A Yuppie is someone who believes it's courageous to eat in a restaurant that hasn't been reviewed yet.
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I don't think fascism is dying for.
Mort Sahl
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There's so much Botox around now that you can't tell when a Jewish girl is angry!
Mort Sahl
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Most people past college age are not atheists. It's too hard to be in society, for one thing. Because you don't get any days off. And if you're an agnostic you don't know whether you get them off or not.
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Everything I tell you is true, but this is factual.
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Obama said he went to Libya because of his conscience. Did anyone ever wrestle with his conscience and lose?
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There's a danger our fiscal bankruptcy might overtake our moral bankruptcy.
Mort Sahl
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I found people looked better when they laughed
Mort Sahl
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Nixon's the kind of guy that if you were drowning fifty feet off shore, he'd throw you a thirty foot rope. Then Kissinger would go on TV the next night and say that the President had met you more than half-way.
Mort Sahl
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Remember that no matter how selfish, how cruel, how unfeeling you have been today, every time you take a breath, you make a flower happy.
Mort Sahl
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That feeling of hopelessness only serves your masters.
Mort Sahl
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There are Russian spies here now. And if we're lucky, they'll steal some of our secrets and they'll be two years behind.
Mort Sahl
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The distance between taking social action and having the knowledge is as wide as the mouth of the Mississippi.
Mort Sahl
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I don't believe in good people and bad people. I believe in the better parts of people.
Mort Sahl
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If you were the only person left on the planet, I would have to attack you. That's my job.
Mort Sahl