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A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now.

Mort Sahl

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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Reformation
Believes
Reform
Conservative
Someone
Believe

More quotes by Mort Sahl

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Obama said he went to Libya because of his conscience. Did anyone ever wrestle with his conscience and lose?
Mort Sahl
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One thing about being narrow-minded: you'll never be lonely.
Mort Sahl
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I found people looked better when they laughed
Mort Sahl
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New book on Malcolm X says we don't know how he was killed. Want to bring in the FBI. Maybe they were in already.
Mort Sahl
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You haven't lived until you've died in California
Mort Sahl
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I used to go out with actresses and other female impersonators.
Mort Sahl
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We all know that America is the worst country in the world, except for all the others.
Mort Sahl
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In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.
Mort Sahl
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There are Russian spies here now. And if we're lucky, they'll steal some of our secrets and they'll be two years behind.
Mort Sahl
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I don't believe in good people and bad people. I believe in the better parts of people.
Mort Sahl
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Remember that no matter how selfish, how cruel, how unfeeling you have been today, every time you take a breath, you make a flower happy.
Mort Sahl
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There were four million people in the American Colonies and we had Jefferson and Franklin. Now we have over 200 million and the two top guys are Clinton and Dole. What can you draw from this? Darwin was wrong.
Mort Sahl
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I don't think fascism is dying for.
Mort Sahl
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My whole life is a movie. It's just that there are no dissolves. I have to live every agonizing moment of it. My life needs editing.
Mort Sahl
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Liberals feel unworthy of their possessions. Conservatives feel they deserve everything they've stolen.
Mort Sahl
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Nixon's the kind of guy that if you were drowning fifty feet off shore, he'd throw you a thirty foot rope. Then Kissinger would go on TV the next night and say that the President had met you more than half-way.
Mort Sahl
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I never met a man I didn't like until I met Will Rogers.
Mort Sahl
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I'm not a liberal, I'm a radical!
Mort Sahl
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Everything I tell you is true, but this is factual.
Mort Sahl
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Women want their men to be cops. They want you to punish them and tell them what the limits are. The only thing that women hate worse from a man than being slapped is when you get on your knees and say you're sorry.
Mort Sahl