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We all know that America is the worst country in the world, except for all the others.
Mort Sahl
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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
World
Except
Worst
Others
America
Country
More quotes by Mort Sahl
If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?
Mort Sahl
Obama said he went to Libya because of his conscience. Did anyone ever wrestle with his conscience and lose?
Mort Sahl
The New York Times is the official leak of the State Department.
Mort Sahl
Will Rogers…used to come out with a newspaper and pretend he was a yokel criticizing the intellectuals who ran the government. I come out with a newspaper and pretend I’m an intellectual making fun of the yokels running the government.
Mort Sahl
There's a danger our fiscal bankruptcy might overtake our moral bankruptcy.
Mort Sahl
I'm for capital punishment. You've got to execute people. How else are they going to learn?
Mort Sahl
Reagan won because he ran against Jimmy Carter. If he ran unopposed he would have lost.
Mort Sahl
There were four million people in the American Colonies and we had Jefferson and Franklin. Now we have over 200 million and the two top guys are Clinton and Dole. What can you draw from this? Darwin was wrong.
Mort Sahl
I went to computer class with my Dell and I was bullied by a guy with a Mac.
Mort Sahl
You haven't lived until you've died in California
Mort Sahl
Obama says his recreation consists of reading the Constitution... looking for a loophole.
Mort Sahl
This matter of two sides to every question is bad logic and bad practice: sometimes there are no sides sometimes there are a hundred.
Mort Sahl
If you were the only person left on the planet, I would have to attack you. That's my job.
Mort Sahl
There are Russian spies here now. And if we're lucky, they'll steal some of our secrets and they'll be two years behind.
Mort Sahl
Everything I tell you is true, but this is factual.
Mort Sahl
Obama is running again for spite.
Mort Sahl
I found people looked better when they laughed
Mort Sahl
The distance between taking social action and having the knowledge is as wide as the mouth of the Mississippi.
Mort Sahl
There's so much Botox around now that you can't tell when a Jewish girl is angry!
Mort Sahl
In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.
Mort Sahl