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We all know that America is the worst country in the world, except for all the others.

Mort Sahl

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Mort Sahl
Age: 97
Born: 1927
Born: May 11
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Montreal
Quebec
Morton Lyon Sahl
Others
America
Country
World
Except
Worst

More quotes by Mort Sahl

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Most people past college age are not atheists. It's too hard to be in society, for one thing. Because you don't get any days off. And if you're an agnostic you don't know whether you get them off or not.
Mort Sahl
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My whole life is a movie. It's just that there are no dissolves. I have to live every agonizing moment of it. My life needs editing.
Mort Sahl
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You haven't lived until you've died in California
Mort Sahl
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If anybody comes up to you and says, My kid is a conservative - why is that? you say, Remember in the 60′s when we told you if you kept using drugs your kids would be mutants?
Mort Sahl
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If you were the only person left on the planet, I would have to attack you. That's my job.
Mort Sahl
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I went to computer class with my Dell and I was bullied by a guy with a Mac.
Mort Sahl
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The New York Times is the official leak of the State Department.
Mort Sahl
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In the forties, to get a girl you had to be a GI or a jock. In the fifties, to get a girl you had to be Jewish. In the sixties, to get a girl you had to be black. In the seventies, to get a girl you've got to be a girl.
Mort Sahl
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That feeling of hopelessness only serves your masters.
Mort Sahl
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Every time the Russians throw an American in jail, the Committee throws an American in jail to get even.
Mort Sahl
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I never met a man I didn't like until I met Will Rogers.
Mort Sahl
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Remember that no matter how selfish, how cruel, how unfeeling you have been today, every time you take a breath, you make a flower happy.
Mort Sahl
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A conservative is someone who believes in reform. But not now.
Mort Sahl
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Obama said he went to Libya because of his conscience. Did anyone ever wrestle with his conscience and lose?
Mort Sahl
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Obama is running again for spite.
Mort Sahl
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If you can't join them, beat them.
Mort Sahl
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There's so much Botox around now that you can't tell when a Jewish girl is angry!
Mort Sahl
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Obama says his recreation consists of reading the Constitution... looking for a loophole.
Mort Sahl
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I'm not a liberal, I'm a radical!
Mort Sahl
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I used to go out with actresses and other female impersonators.
Mort Sahl