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It's hard to argue against cynics - they always sound smarter than optimists because they have so much evidence on their side.

Molly Ivins

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Molly Ivins
Age: 62 †
Born: 1944
Born: August 30
Died: 2007
Died: January 31
Columnist
Journalist
Writer
Monterey
California
Side
Optimists
Sides
Cynic
Sound
Optimist
Hard
Cynicism
Much
Argue
Always
Smarter
Arguing
Evidence
Cynics

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Calling George Bush shallow is like calling a dwarf short.
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Mostly, Texas women are tough in some very fundamental ways. Not unfeminine, nor necessarily unladylike, just tough!
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Being slightly paranoid is like being slightly pregnant - it tends to get worse.
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Democracy requires a certain relish for confusion
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It's like, duh. Just when you thought there wasn't a dime's worth of difference between the two parties, the Republicans go and prove you're wrong.
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I don't so much mind that newspapers are dying - it's watching them commit suicide that pisses me off.
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How the American right managed to convince itself that the programs to alleviate poverty are responsible for the consequences of poverty will someday be studied as a notorious mass illusion.
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During a recent panel on the numerous failures of American journalism, I proposed that almost all stories about government should begin: “Look out! They're about to smack you around again!
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I used to go on college campuses 25 years ago and announce I was a feminist, and people thought it meant I believed in free love and was available for a quick hop in the sack. ... Now I go on college campuses and say I'm a feminist, and half of them think it means I'm a lesbian. How'd we get from there to here without passing Go?
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I still believe in Hope - mostly because there's no such place as Fingers Crossed, Arkansas.
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When Michael Jackson, a poor black boy who grew up to be a rich, white woman, married Elvis Presley's daughter the Scientologist. Makes you proud to be an American, dudn't it?
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Every two years, one of the most hotly contested elections in Texas is the poll taken among members of the capitol press corps to determine who are actually the ten stupidest members of the Legislature. Two years ago, there were thirty-seven official nominees and several write-ins.
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Of course, it has never paid much.
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Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce.
Molly Ivins
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Texas is a fine place for men and dogs, but hell on women and horses.
Molly Ivins
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I'm sorry that government involves filling out a lot of forms. ... I'm sorry myself that we're not still on the frontier, where we could all tote guns, shoot anything that moved and spit to our hearts' content. But we live in a diverse and crowded country, and with civilization comes regulation.
Molly Ivins
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Conservatives are fond of pointing out there are problems in this world can't be solved by throwing money at them. There are even more that can't be solved by dropping bombs on them.
Molly Ivins
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Next time I tell you someone from Texas should not be president of the United States, please pay attention.
Molly Ivins
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Texas is not a civilized place. Texans shoot one another a lot. They also knife, razor, and stomp one another to death with some frequency. And they fight in bars all the time.
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Either we figure out how to keep corporate cash out of the political system or we lose the democracy.
Molly Ivins