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He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.

Molly Ivins

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Molly Ivins
Age: 62 †
Born: 1944
Born: August 30
Died: 2007
Died: January 31
Columnist
Journalist
Writer
Monterey
California
Keyholes
Sarcastic
Minded
Narrow
Eyes
Eye
Keyhole

More quotes by Molly Ivins

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If you ever get to the place where injustice doesn't bother you, you're dead.
Molly Ivins
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Of course, it has never paid much.
Molly Ivins
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The thing about democracy, beloveds, is that it is not neat, orderly, or quiet. It requires a certain relish for confusion.
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Most of us think of government as them. Yet government isn't Them: It's us.
Molly Ivins
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As they say around the Texas Legislature, if you can't drink their whiskey, screw their women, take their money, and vote against 'em anyway, you don't belong in office.
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Democracy requires a certain relish for confusion
Molly Ivins
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As I have pointed out time and again, it's a hell of a lot cheaper to send little kids to school than it is to let them grow up into young thugs who have to be sent to prison, not to mention the savings in the wear and tear on the nerves, property, and safety of the rest of the citizenry.
Molly Ivins
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It's hard to argue against cynics - they always sound smarter than optimists because they have so much evidence on their side.
Molly Ivins
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I believe in practicing prudence at least once every two or three years.
Molly Ivins
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Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented.
Molly Ivins
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The Founders were right all along, but the results are a lot funnier than they intended.
Molly Ivins
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I know: Guns Don't Kill People. But I suspect that they have something to do with it. If you point your finger at someone and say, Bang, bang, you're dead, not much actually happens.
Molly Ivins
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Nice is a pallid virtue. Not like honesty or courage or perseverance. On the other hand, in a nation notably lacking in civility, there is much to be said for nice.
Molly Ivins
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How the American right managed to convince itself that the programs to alleviate poverty are responsible for the consequences of poverty will someday be studied as a notorious mass illusion.
Molly Ivins
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Every two years, one of the most hotly contested elections in Texas is the poll taken among members of the capitol press corps to determine who are actually the ten stupidest members of the Legislature. Two years ago, there were thirty-seven official nominees and several write-ins.
Molly Ivins
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Naturally, when it comes to voting, we in Texas are accustomed to discerning that fine hair’s-breadth worth of difference that makes one hopeless dipstick slightly less awful than the other. But it does raise the question: Why bother?
Molly Ivins
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In city rooms and in the bars where newspeople drink, you can find out what's going on. You can't find it in the papers.
Molly Ivins
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Politics is not a picture on a wall or a television sitcom that you can decide you don't much care for.
Molly Ivins
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My friend Mercedes Pena made me get in touch with my emotions just before I had a breast cut off. Just as I suspected, they were awful. How do you Latinas do this all the time in touch with your emotions? I asked her. That's why we take siestas, she replied.
Molly Ivins
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Satire is traditionally the weapon of the powerless against the powerful.
Molly Ivins