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Some days, I'd feel better with Punxsutawney Phil in the Oval Office - at least he doesn't lie about the weather.

Molly Ivins

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Molly Ivins
Age: 62 †
Born: 1944
Born: August 30
Died: 2007
Died: January 31
Columnist
Journalist
Writer
Monterey
California
Better
Phil
Feel
Oval
Feels
Weather
Office
Least
Days
Lying
Doesn

More quotes by Molly Ivins

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On a personal note: I have contracted an outstanding case of breast cancer, from which I intend to recover. I don't need get-well cards, but I would like the beloved women readers to do something for me: Go. Get. The. Damn. Mammogram. Done.
Molly Ivins
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The first rule of holes: When you're in one stop digging.
Molly Ivins
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Democracy requires a certain relish for confusion
Molly Ivins
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The Founders were right all along, but the results are a lot funnier than they intended.
Molly Ivins
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He was so narrow minded he could see through a keyhole with both eyes.
Molly Ivins
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Whenever you hear a politician carry on about what a mess the schools are, be aware that you are looking at the culprit.
Molly Ivins
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My friend Mercedes Pena made me get in touch with my emotions just before I had a breast cut off. Just as I suspected, they were awful. How do you Latinas do this all the time in touch with your emotions? I asked her. That's why we take siestas, she replied.
Molly Ivins
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We often seem to be swimming through such a miasma of sexual violence - in advertising, television programming, heavy metal, rap, films, and worst of all, in the home - that even First Amendment absolutists sometimes daydream about how nice it would be to have government-as-nanny just outlaw all this effluent.
Molly Ivins
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And the funny thing is, I've always been an optimist - it's practically a congenital disorder with me.
Molly Ivins
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It's hard to convince people that you're killing them for their own good.
Molly Ivins
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When Michael Jackson, a poor black boy who grew up to be a rich, white woman, married Elvis Presley's daughter the Scientologist. Makes you proud to be an American, dudn't it?
Molly Ivins
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Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented.
Molly Ivins
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So keep fightin' for freedom and justice, beloveds, but don't you forget to have fun doin' it. Lord, let your laughter ring forth. Be outrageous, ridicule the fraidy-cats, rejoice in all the oddities that freedom can produce.
Molly Ivins
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Nice is a pallid virtue. Not like honesty or courage or perseverance. On the other hand, in a nation notably lacking in civility, there is much to be said for nice.
Molly Ivins
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Bad policies, stupid policies, gutless policies have real consequences.
Molly Ivins
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Either we figure out how to keep corporate cash out of the political system or we lose the democracy.
Molly Ivins
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no one has ever accused Texas of being in the vanguard of social progress. This is the most macho state in the U.S. of A. By lore, legend, and fact, Texas is 'hell' on women and horses.
Molly Ivins
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The thing is this: You got to have fun while you're fightin' for freedom, 'cause you don't always win.
Molly Ivins
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I believe all Southern liberals come from the same starting point--race. Once you figure out they are lying to you about race, you start to question everything.
Molly Ivins
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I don't so much mind that newspapers are dying - it's watching them commit suicide that pisses me off.
Molly Ivins