Quote

A man is hit by a car while crossing a Beverly Hills street. A woman rushes to him and cradles his head in her lap, asking, Are you comfortable? The man answers, I make a nice living.

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Comfortable
Crossings
Answers
Lap
Head
Cradle
Nice
Hills
Woman
Street
Cradles
Living
Car
Beverly
Make
Asking
Rushes
Men
Streets
Crossing

More quotes by Milton Berle

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One of those Christmas songs says, You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not pout. How's my wife going to get along?
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I know why superman left krypton. Earth was the only place where he could get steriods!
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For Christmas the just came out with a battery-operated battery. But the batteries aren't included.
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I don't worry too much about sex education in the schools. If the kids learn it like they do everything else, they won't know how.
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I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can't get killed by a blank?
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They've got plastic Christmas trees now. They're hard to tell from the real aluminum ones.
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I made a terrible mistake last Christmas. My wife made me swear that I wouldn't give her a fancy gift. And I didn't.
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I gave my wife a gift certificate for Christmas. She ran out to exchange it for a bigger size.
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I just bought a great gift for my boss - a leaky ant farm.
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I bought my son a bat for Christmas. On New Year's it flew away.
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Do you want to feel insecure? Count the number of Christmas cards you sent out, and then count those you received.
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Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies.
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I can't tell you his age, but when he was born the wonder drug was Mercurochrome.
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I like to think of myself as the middleman between Fred Allen and Henny Youngman.
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I have a brother who is afraid to go to sleep, he dreams he's working.
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I was in a department store and I saw a weird-looking gadget. I asked the young saleslady what it was. She answered, It doesn't do anything. It's just a Christmas gift.
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Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
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My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.
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Now that doctors have stopped making house calls, lots of patients now have to die without their help.
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I bought an ideal gift for my mother-in-law - a battery-operated mouth.
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