Quote

A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, Did you miss a step? No, he answers, I hit every one of them!

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Missing
Steps
Answers
Rushes
Somebody
Stairs
Asks
Falls
Fall
Flight
Every
Miss
Men
Step

More quotes by Milton Berle

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Our tree was so puny we used orthopedic bulbs.
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Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is.
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My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don't try to run her life, and I don't try to run mine.
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My son asked for very little - a kickstand, with a motorcycle attached.
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Now that doctors have stopped making house calls, lots of patients now have to die without their help.
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My wife can't figure out what to buy me. What do you give a man who's had everything up to here?
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Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies.
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Do you want to feel insecure? Count the number of Christmas cards you sent out, and then count those you received.
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I know why superman left krypton. Earth was the only place where he could get steriods!
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I bought an ideal gift for my mother-in-law - a battery-operated mouth.
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If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?
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I don't mind personal insults, but when you insult the jokes that I tell you're insulting Fred Allen, Bob Hope, Burns and Allen, Trevor McGee and Molly Picon.
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The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired.
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She was nice to him on Valentine's Day. She gave him a heart-shaped rash.
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Santa is having a tough time this year. Last year he deducted eight billion for gifts, and the IRS wants an itemized list
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If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
Milton Berle
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I made a terrible mistake last Christmas. My wife made me swear that I wouldn't give her a fancy gift. And I didn't.
Milton Berle
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This is how it is today: The teachers are afraid of the principals. The principals are afraid of the superintendents. The superintendents are afraid of the board of education. The board is afraid of the parents. The parents are afraid of the children. The children are afraid of nothing!
Milton Berle
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You look like a normal person, if you can find a normal person who wants to look like that.
Milton Berle
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Just remember, golf is flog spelled backwards.
Milton Berle