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Sex at eighty-four is terrific, especially the one in the winter.
Milton Berle
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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Winter
Sex
Especially
Four
Eighty
Terrific
More quotes by Milton Berle
I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine.
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They've got plastic Christmas trees now. They're hard to tell from the real aluminum ones.
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War toys are scary. They have a rocket launcher with a bayonet attached, in case you miss.
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My wife can't figure out what to buy me. What do you give a man who's had everything up to here?
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I gave my wife a gift certificate for Christmas. She ran out to exchange it for a bigger size.
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Who says we didn't have controversial subjects on TV back in my time? Remember Bonanza? It was about three guys in high heels living together
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Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
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It's always consoling to know that today's Christmas gifts are tomorrow's garage sales.
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For every studen with a spark of brilliance, there are about ten with ignition trouble.
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Money can't buy you happiness. It just helps you look for it in more places.
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Santa is having a tough time this year. Last year he deducted eight billion for gifts, and the IRS wants an itemized list
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It's amazing how fast later comes when you buy now!
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I bought my mother-in-law a beautiful chair for Christmas, but she won't let me plug it in.
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All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express.
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I don't mind personal insults, but when you insult the jokes that I tell you're insulting Fred Allen, Bob Hope, Burns and Allen, Trevor McGee and Molly Picon.
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A man is hit by a car while crossing a Beverly Hills street. A woman rushes to him and cradles his head in her lap, asking, Are you comfortable? The man answers, I make a nice living.
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Do you want to feel insecure? Count the number of Christmas cards you sent out, and then count those you received.
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A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
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On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse.
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My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don't try to run her life, and I don't try to run mine.
Milton Berle