Quote

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door, but only as long as it's not visible from the street.

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Opportunity
Doesn
Knock
Long
Visible
Street
Door
Build
Streets
Doors

More quotes by Milton Berle

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My wife and I were shopping for the whole family. In the music department my wife said, Let's get your nephew a set of drums. That's what your brother did to us last year.
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My son asked for very little - a kickstand, with a motorcycle attached.
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The company accountant is shy and retiring. He's shy a quarter of a million dollars. That's why he's retiring.
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There are a lot of things money can't buy. Not one of them is on my son's list.
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I can't tell you his age, but when he was born the wonder drug was Mercurochrome.
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For every studen with a spark of brilliance, there are about ten with ignition trouble.
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I just bought a great gift for my boss - a leaky ant farm.
Milton Berle
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On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse.
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They've got plastic Christmas trees now. They're hard to tell from the real aluminum ones.
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Laughter is the best medicine in the world.
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Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
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A man is hit by a car while crossing a Beverly Hills street. A woman rushes to him and cradles his head in her lap, asking, Are you comfortable? The man answers, I make a nice living.
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I bought my mother-in-law a beautiful chair for Christmas, but she won't let me plug it in.
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She was nice to him on Valentine's Day. She gave him a heart-shaped rash.
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I bought my son a bat for Christmas. On New Year's it flew away.
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Sir, I didn't deserve the grade you gave me on this test. Do you know a lower one?
Milton Berle
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I was in a department store and I saw a weird-looking gadget. I asked the young saleslady what it was. She answered, It doesn't do anything. It's just a Christmas gift.
Milton Berle
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This is how it is today: The teachers are afraid of the principals. The principals are afraid of the superintendents. The superintendents are afraid of the board of education. The board is afraid of the parents. The parents are afraid of the children. The children are afraid of nothing!
Milton Berle
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I take New Years with a grain of salt and three aspirins.
Milton Berle
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For Christmas the just came out with a battery-operated battery. But the batteries aren't included.
Milton Berle