Quote

One of those Christmas songs says, You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not pout. How's my wife going to get along?

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Going
Christmas
Cry
Songs
Along
Says
Wife
Song
Pout
Better
Shout

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You're aging when your actions creak louder than your words.
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My wife can't figure out what to buy me. What do you give a man who's had everything up to here?
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She was nice to him on Valentine's Day. She gave him a heart-shaped rash.
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A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
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For Christmas the just came out with a battery-operated battery. But the batteries aren't included.
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My wife calls our waterbed the Dead Sea.
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A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, Did you miss a step? No, he answers, I hit every one of them!
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You look like a normal person, if you can find a normal person who wants to look like that.
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Sir, I didn't deserve the grade you gave me on this test. Do you know a lower one?
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I made a terrible mistake last Christmas. My wife made me swear that I wouldn't give her a fancy gift. And I didn't.
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I gave my wife a gift certificate for Christmas. She ran out to exchange it for a bigger size.
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Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
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Santa is having a tough time this year. Last year he deducted eight billion for gifts, and the IRS wants an itemized list
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I have a brother who is afraid to go to sleep, he dreams he's working.
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I take New Years with a grain of salt and three aspirins.
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