Quote

My wife and I were shopping for the whole family. In the music department my wife said, Let's get your nephew a set of drums. That's what your brother did to us last year.

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Lasts
Nephew
Last
Drums
Family
Shopping
Music
Department
Whole
Christmas
Years
Brother
Wife
Year

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All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express.
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Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
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I bought an ideal gift for my mother-in-law - a battery-operated mouth.
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Why are we honoring this man? Have we run out of human beings?
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It was a tough school. The kids on the debating team took steroids!
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I bought my son an indestructible toy. Yesterday he left it in the driveway. It broke my car.
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For Christmas the just came out with a battery-operated battery. But the batteries aren't included.
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A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, Did you miss a step? No, he answers, I hit every one of them!
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The company accountant is shy and retiring. He's shy a quarter of a million dollars. That's why he's retiring.
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Sir, I didn't deserve the grade you gave me on this test. Do you know a lower one?
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Our tree was so puny we used orthopedic bulbs.
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Do you realise that Eve was the only woman who ever took a man's side?
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I was in a department store and I saw a weird-looking gadget. I asked the young saleslady what it was. She answered, It doesn't do anything. It's just a Christmas gift.
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