Quote

I was in a department store and I saw a weird-looking gadget. I asked the young saleslady what it was. She answered, It doesn't do anything. It's just a Christmas gift.

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Young
Stores
Anything
Christmas
Weird
Gift
Gadget
Saws
Gadgets
Asked
Answered
Looking
Store
Doesn
Department

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In Washington, a man gets up to speak and doesn't say a thing, and the other men disagree with him for three hours.
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Nowadays, when a speaker tells the graduates that the future is theirs--is that a promise or a threat?
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A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, Did you miss a step? No, he answers, I hit every one of them!
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Sex at eighty-four is terrific, especially the one in the winter.
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It's always consoling to know that today's Christmas gifts are tomorrow's garage sales.
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Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies.
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They've got plastic Christmas trees now. They're hard to tell from the real aluminum ones.
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For every studen with a spark of brilliance, there are about ten with ignition trouble.
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Now that doctors have stopped making house calls, lots of patients now have to die without their help.
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I don't worry too much about sex education in the schools. If the kids learn it like they do everything else, they won't know how.
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One of those Christmas songs says, You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not pout. How's my wife going to get along?
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All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express.
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It was a tough school. The kids on the debating team took steroids!
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