Quote

I was in a department store and I saw a weird-looking gadget. I asked the young saleslady what it was. She answered, It doesn't do anything. It's just a Christmas gift.

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Young
Stores
Anything
Christmas
Weird
Gift
Gadget
Saws
Gadgets
Asked
Answered
Looking
Store
Doesn
Department

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In the suburbs it's hard to buy your Christmas gifts early in the year. You never know who your friends will be in December.
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It was a tough school. The kids on the debating team took steroids!
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I take New Years with a grain of salt and three aspirins.
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Just remember, golf is flog spelled backwards.
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I know why superman left krypton. Earth was the only place where he could get steriods!
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If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?
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The company accountant is shy and retiring. He's shy a quarter of a million dollars. That's why he's retiring.
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A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, Did you miss a step? No, he answers, I hit every one of them!
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I made a terrible mistake last Christmas. My wife made me swear that I wouldn't give her a fancy gift. And I didn't.
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I bought my mother-in-law a beautiful chair for Christmas, but she won't let me plug it in.
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My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.
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I gave my wife a twenty-five-dollar gift certificate. She used it as a down payment on a mink coat.
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Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
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My wife can't figure out what to buy me. What do you give a man who's had everything up to here?
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War toys are scary. They have a rocket launcher with a bayonet attached, in case you miss.
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You're aging when your actions creak louder than your words.
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I just filled out my income tax forms. Who says you can't get killed by a blank?
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I bought my son a bat for Christmas. On New Year's it flew away.
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Santa is having a tough time this year. Last year he deducted eight billion for gifts, and the IRS wants an itemized list
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