Quote

I gave my wife a twenty-five-dollar gift certificate. She used it as a down payment on a mink coat.

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Wife
Coats
Five
Dollar
Used
Twenty
Christmas
Mink
Twenties
Certificate
Dollars
Certificates
Gift
Coat
Gave
Payment

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I like to think of myself as the middleman between Fred Allen and Henny Youngman.
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I don't worry too much about sex education in the schools. If the kids learn it like they do everything else, they won't know how.
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Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
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Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.
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She was nice to him on Valentine's Day. She gave him a heart-shaped rash.
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It's always consoling to know that today's Christmas gifts are tomorrow's garage sales.
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Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is.
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For Christmas the just came out with a battery-operated battery. But the batteries aren't included.
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All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express.
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I just bought a great gift for my boss - a leaky ant farm.
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You look like a normal person, if you can find a normal person who wants to look like that.
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War toys are scary. They have a rocket launcher with a bayonet attached, in case you miss.
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