Quote

I bought my son an indestructible toy. Yesterday he left it in the driveway. It broke my car.

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Left
Indestructible
Toys
Bought
Christmas
Broke
Yesterday
Son
Car
Driveway

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Just remember, golf is flog spelled backwards.
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In Washington, a man gets up to speak and doesn't say a thing, and the other men disagree with him for three hours.
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My wife can't figure out what to buy me. What do you give a man who's had everything up to here?
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I know why superman left krypton. Earth was the only place where he could get steriods!
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It's rough to go through life with your contents looking as if they settled during shipping.
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One teacher recently retired with a half-million dollars after 30 years of working hard, caring, dedicating herself and totally immensing herself in the problems of the students. That gave her $50. The rest of the money came from the death of a rich uncle.
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You look like a normal person, if you can find a normal person who wants to look like that.
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My wife and I were shopping for the whole family. In the music department my wife said, Let's get your nephew a set of drums. That's what your brother did to us last year.
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Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies.
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If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door, but only as long as it's not visible from the street.
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