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Nowadays, when a speaker tells the graduates that the future is theirs--is that a promise or a threat?

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Future
Speakers
Graduates
Nowadays
Tells
Threat
Promise
Teaching
Education
Speaker

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Now that doctors have stopped making house calls, lots of patients now have to die without their help.
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I bought my mother-in-law a beautiful chair for Christmas, but she won't let me plug it in.
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Our tree was so puny we used orthopedic bulbs.
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War toys are scary. They have a rocket launcher with a bayonet attached, in case you miss.
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On Valentine's Day, I wired flowers for my mother-in-law, but she found the fuse.
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Laughter is the best medicine in the world.
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One of those Christmas songs says, You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not pout. How's my wife going to get along?
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It's rough to go through life with your contents looking as if they settled during shipping.
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My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don't try to run her life, and I don't try to run mine.
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It's always consoling to know that today's Christmas gifts are tomorrow's garage sales.
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You're aging when your actions creak louder than your words.
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The company accountant is shy and retiring. He's shy a quarter of a million dollars. That's why he's retiring.
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In the suburbs it's hard to buy your Christmas gifts early in the year. You never know who your friends will be in December.
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My son asked for very little - a kickstand, with a motorcycle attached.
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I don't mind personal insults, but when you insult the jokes that I tell you're insulting Fred Allen, Bob Hope, Burns and Allen, Trevor McGee and Molly Picon.
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I don't worry too much about sex education in the schools. If the kids learn it like they do everything else, they won't know how.
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Just remember, golf is flog spelled backwards.
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I bought an ideal gift for my mother-in-law - a battery-operated mouth.
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Sir, I didn't deserve the grade you gave me on this test. Do you know a lower one?
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If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?
Milton Berle