Quote

For every studen with a spark of brilliance, there are about ten with ignition trouble.

Milton Berle

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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Ten
Intelligence
Teaching
Trouble
Education
Ignition
Every
Brilliance
Spark
Sparks

More quotes by Milton Berle

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I bought my son a bat for Christmas. On New Year's it flew away.
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I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine.
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A man falls down a flight of stairs and somebody rushes over to him and asks, Did you miss a step? No, he answers, I hit every one of them!
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I was in a department store and I saw a weird-looking gadget. I asked the young saleslady what it was. She answered, It doesn't do anything. It's just a Christmas gift.
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Sex at eighty-four is terrific, especially the one in the winter.
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You're aging when your actions creak louder than your words.
Milton Berle
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My son asked for very little - a kickstand, with a motorcycle attached.
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I have a brother who is afraid to go to sleep, he dreams he's working.
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I like to think of myself as the middleman between Fred Allen and Henny Youngman.
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Experience is what you have after you've forgotten her name.
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Santa is having a tough time this year. Last year he deducted eight billion for gifts, and the IRS wants an itemized list
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Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies.
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A man is hit by a car while crossing a Beverly Hills street. A woman rushes to him and cradles his head in her lap, asking, Are you comfortable? The man answers, I make a nice living.
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I don't worry too much about sex education in the schools. If the kids learn it like they do everything else, they won't know how.
Milton Berle
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Your marriage is in trouble if your wife says, 'You're only interested in one thing,' and you can't remember what it is.
Milton Berle
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It's always consoling to know that today's Christmas gifts are tomorrow's garage sales.
Milton Berle
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If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.
Milton Berle
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She was nice to him on Valentine's Day. She gave him a heart-shaped rash.
Milton Berle
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Every year my boss used to give me a bottle of expensive brandy because I'd told him that my doctor suggested a drink once in a while. This year my boss gave me the name of a new doctor.
Milton Berle
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I take New Years with a grain of salt and three aspirins.
Milton Berle