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Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
Milton Berle
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Milton Berle
Age: 93 †
Born: 1908
Born: July 12
Died: 2002
Died: March 27
Comedian
Composer
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
New York City
New York
Life
Folk
Campaign
Campaigns
Folks
Election
Promise
Land
America
More quotes by Milton Berle
It's rough to go through life with your contents looking as if they settled during shipping.
Milton Berle
They've got plastic Christmas trees now. They're hard to tell from the real aluminum ones.
Milton Berle
The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired.
Milton Berle
All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express.
Milton Berle
I know why superman left krypton. Earth was the only place where he could get steriods!
Milton Berle
If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door, but only as long as it's not visible from the street.
Milton Berle
I can't tell you his age, but when he was born the wonder drug was Mercurochrome.
Milton Berle
I gave my wife a gift certificate for Christmas. She ran out to exchange it for a bigger size.
Milton Berle
You're aging when your actions creak louder than your words.
Milton Berle
Talk about cheap - on Christmas Eve, my neighbour shoots off three blanks and tells his kids Santa Claus just committed suicide.
Milton Berle
Sex at eighty-four is terrific, especially the one in the winter.
Milton Berle
It was a tough school. The kids on the debating team took steroids!
Milton Berle
I made a terrible mistake last Christmas. My wife made me swear that I wouldn't give her a fancy gift. And I didn't.
Milton Berle
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours.
Milton Berle
I don't worry too much about sex education in the schools. If the kids learn it like they do everything else, they won't know how.
Milton Berle
You look like a normal person, if you can find a normal person who wants to look like that.
Milton Berle
War toys are scary. They have a rocket launcher with a bayonet attached, in case you miss.
Milton Berle
There are a lot of things money can't buy. Not one of them is on my son's list.
Milton Berle
I like to think of myself as the middleman between Fred Allen and Henny Youngman.
Milton Berle
I have a brother who is afraid to go to sleep, he dreams he's working.
Milton Berle