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Our fear leads us to say no all the time.

Mike Birbiglia

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Mike Birbiglia
Age: 46
Born: 1978
Born: June 20
Actor
Comedian
Executive Producer
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Leads
Fear
Time

More quotes by Mike Birbiglia

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Someone stole my wallet last week. The guy called me up and he was mad at me. He was like 'you gotta get your finances together. You got no cash, your credit cards are maxed out. You don't even have minutes on your calling card. I had to use my card to call you.'
Mike Birbiglia
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Everyone tries to get you to dance at clubs. They come up to you and say You gotta dance! you gotta dance! And then I dance, and they're like, Not like that!
Mike Birbiglia
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Creepy people do the things that decent people want to do, but have decided are not a great idea.
Mike Birbiglia
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Alienation, I suppose, can't be hackneyed because it will always exist.
Mike Birbiglia
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I have this habit of asking 'why do you want to do it?' and then interrupting them to say, 'here's why you want to do it.' Because it's in the 'yes...and' spirit [rule of improvisation].
Mike Birbiglia
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A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.'
Mike Birbiglia
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I'm a compulsive everything.
Mike Birbiglia
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Art is socialism but life is capitalism.
Mike Birbiglia
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You can express love by calling out the truth out of the situation as opposed to dancing around it.
Mike Birbiglia
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I just don't give off a great first impression.
Mike Birbiglia
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Sometimes when I do a joke and it doesn't get a lot of laughs, it kind of feels like I'm doing jazz. That's kinda cool because jazz is cool, but sometimes jazz sucks ... Maybe I'm the Kenny G of comedy.
Mike Birbiglia
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I think spending a lot of time with my mom, who's a talker and a storyteller, and my dad, who has kind of a soft-spoken, understated sense of humor, I think that's how I became what I am, which is sort of an understated storyteller.
Mike Birbiglia
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I read recently that women still make 30% less than men in the workplace. Which I think is fine, cause if we didn't make 30% more, you guys would marry each other.
Mike Birbiglia
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I'm a big fan of pastries the size of a baby that contain enough calories for a year. That seems like an effective use of time.
Mike Birbiglia
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My writing process is very feedback-based. When I do stand-up, I listen to the audience. I try to understand what's connecting, what's not connecting, and then rewrite, rewrite and rewrite.
Mike Birbiglia
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I take the subway four times a day, or close to it. I just love the subway! My grandfather worked as an electrician when they were digging the subway.
Mike Birbiglia
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Sex and pizza, they say, are similar. When it's good, it's good. When it's bad, you get it on your shirt.
Mike Birbiglia
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There are so many people who are clever. There are 8000 people at Princeton who are more clever than the three of us at this table. BUT, we have the ability to give something that they don't have...which is us.
Mike Birbiglia
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I struggled with that notion early in my career. 'I know this is funny but nobody is laughing.' This thought occurred for years.
Mike Birbiglia
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I couldn't recommend more that people put themselves in a situation where they can see a lot of work that they admire, and for free.
Mike Birbiglia