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Our fear leads us to say no all the time.

Mike Birbiglia

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Mike Birbiglia
Age: 46
Born: 1978
Born: June 20
Actor
Comedian
Executive Producer
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Leads
Fear
Time

More quotes by Mike Birbiglia

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I just don't give off a great first impression.
Mike Birbiglia
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Sometimes when my fans come up to me, they think it's going to be entertaining, like I'm going to tell jokes or do bits, and then instead of that I end up talking about really mundane things with my fans, and then they're kind of like, This is boring. I want to go talk to somebody else. I think I bore my fans to death by over-talking to them.
Mike Birbiglia
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The ability to workshop in stand-up comedy is incomparable to any art form, in my opinion.
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I was made to believe that my life was going to be fixed and it wasn't. I'm still the same loser who had flown to Los Angeles on my sister's frequent flier miles just six days before.
Mike Birbiglia
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I think Mitch Hedberg is one of the great comedians of the past 20 years.
Mike Birbiglia
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Someone stole my wallet last week. The guy called me up and he was mad at me. He was like 'you gotta get your finances together. You got no cash, your credit cards are maxed out. You don't even have minutes on your calling card. I had to use my card to call you.'
Mike Birbiglia
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Elia Kazan. He wrote my favorite book about filmmaking, 'Elia Kazan: On Directing.' There is a thing in the book that I do every time, it's part of my production structure. He said when you're hiring an actor, ask them what draws them to the project, and don't lead them to the answer.
Mike Birbiglia
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I went to the doctor, and they found something in my bladder. And whenever they find something, it's never anything good like, We found something in your bladder AND IT'S SEASON TICKETS TO THE YANKEES!!
Mike Birbiglia
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I don't smoke a lot of pot anymore. No one wants to hang around a guy who ends every sentence with, Do you guys hate me?
Mike Birbiglia
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I thought if I could do stand-up comedy well enough, I could parlay it back into films - like Charlie Chaplin and Woody Allen did. They merged principles of comedy and drama together, and that's what my first film really was, a stab at that kind of comedy.
Mike Birbiglia
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Art is socialism but life is capitalism.
Mike Birbiglia
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I always try to attack the most honest issues I can in my comedy.
Mike Birbiglia
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I love pizza so much, I would marry pizza, but it would just be an elaborate ploy to eat her whole family at the reception.
Mike Birbiglia
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I find my fans are really funny people. Most comedians can't say that about their fans.
Mike Birbiglia
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The key to eating healthy is not eating any food that has a TV commercial.
Mike Birbiglia
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In our culture right now, I want to take on this notion of what a singular success means. We think success is one thing, but it's actually a spectrum of where our life takes us.
Mike Birbiglia
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Creepy people do the things that decent people want to do, but have decided are not a great idea.
Mike Birbiglia
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The people who are the worst at news, who kind of engage in what I call the World Wrestling of news, have kind of set the bar for where news is.
Mike Birbiglia
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Saturday night is perfect for writers because other people have plans.
Mike Birbiglia
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Falling in love is a completely transcendent experience. It's like eating pizza-flavored ice cream
Mike Birbiglia