Quote

I performed for the U.S. troops in Guantanamo Bay. And signed autographs for people who've been gone from America for so long they didn't realize that I'm not famous.

Mike Birbiglia

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Mike Birbiglia
Age: 46
Born: 1978
Born: June 20
Actor
Comedian
Executive Producer
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Humor
Realizing
Gone
Autographs
Funny
Signed
Didn
Performed
Troops
America
Famous
Long
Realize
People

More quotes by Mike Birbiglia

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Everyone tries to get you to dance at clubs. They come up to you and say You gotta dance! you gotta dance! And then I dance, and they're like, Not like that!
Mike Birbiglia
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I've read that Steven Wright's style was born out of genuine nervousness.
Mike Birbiglia
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The list of fun and easily fixed brain diseases is very short.
Mike Birbiglia
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You can always tell who went to catholic school, because they're atheists.
Mike Birbiglia
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A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.'
Mike Birbiglia
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What I write is emotionally honest and truthful as the human experience can be, to make people feel less alone, or at least that's the hope.
Mike Birbiglia
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Eugene Mirman is the Andy Warhol of comedy. People look to him for what's next in comedy, and he emails these people back promptly. The Will to Whatevs put me in a great mood because I was laughing out loud. Alone. That's hard to do.
Mike Birbiglia
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I read recently that women still make 30% less than men in the workplace. Which I think is fine, cause if we didn't make 30% more, you guys would marry each other.
Mike Birbiglia
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I'm a big fan of pastries the size of a baby that contain enough calories for a year. That seems like an effective use of time.
Mike Birbiglia
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Sometimes when my fans come up to me, they think it's going to be entertaining, like I'm going to tell jokes or do bits, and then instead of that I end up talking about really mundane things with my fans, and then they're kind of like, This is boring. I want to go talk to somebody else. I think I bore my fans to death by over-talking to them.
Mike Birbiglia
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I think Mitch Hedberg is one of the great comedians of the past 20 years.
Mike Birbiglia
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I don't drink a lot. My family calls me an old soul. And my friends call me a pussy.
Mike Birbiglia
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I think the reason why I'm so alluring to networks is because on the surface I'm like a quintessential relatable, boring white guy. A great many sitcoms have been anchored by a boring white guy, so I feel like what they want to mine from me are my more generic qualities.
Mike Birbiglia
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I never looked at my parents' marriage or really anyone who had been married more than 30 years and thought, 'I gotta get me some of that!'
Mike Birbiglia
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I feel like people have more in common than the news reports.
Mike Birbiglia
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I've been selfish over the years, and other people who have made it have too, but I can only speak for myself.
Mike Birbiglia
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The ability to workshop in stand-up comedy is incomparable to any art form, in my opinion.
Mike Birbiglia
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In our culture right now, I want to take on this notion of what a singular success means. We think success is one thing, but it's actually a spectrum of where our life takes us.
Mike Birbiglia
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I think spending a lot of time with my mom, who's a talker and a storyteller, and my dad, who has kind of a soft-spoken, understated sense of humor, I think that's how I became what I am, which is sort of an understated storyteller.
Mike Birbiglia
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The key is to do what you love.
Mike Birbiglia