Quote

I just don't give off a great first impression.

Mike Birbiglia

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Mike Birbiglia
Age: 46
Born: 1978
Born: June 20
Actor
Comedian
Executive Producer
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Great
Impression
Give
Firsts
First
Giving

More quotes by Mike Birbiglia

Image
I went to the doctor, and they found something in my bladder. And whenever they find something, it's never anything good like, We found something in your bladder AND IT'S SEASON TICKETS TO THE YANKEES!!
Mike Birbiglia
Image
Some people come up to me and say You know, in Italy, it's pronounced Ber-beel-lia And I say Well, here in America, you're annoying...
Mike Birbiglia
Image
The list of fun and easily fixed brain diseases is very short.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I think our culture views success as visibility, being seen as being successful. Whereas I've learned that success is rooted in helping and connecting to other people, and knowing where you can contribute. I've kind of spent my thirties doing that, because in my twenties I was seeking any kind of success.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
The ability to workshop in stand-up comedy is incomparable to any art form, in my opinion.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
There are so many people who are clever. There are 8000 people at Princeton who are more clever than the three of us at this table. BUT, we have the ability to give something that they don't have...which is us.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I almost can't even put to words how happy I am that I got married.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
The people who are the worst at news, who kind of engage in what I call the World Wrestling of news, have kind of set the bar for where news is.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
Backup dancers are completely respectable. They're the studio musicians of dance.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I'm a compulsive everything.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
Falling in love is a completely transcendent experience. It's like eating pizza-flavored ice cream
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I've been selfish over the years, and other people who have made it have too, but I can only speak for myself.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I read recently that women still make 30% less than men in the workplace. Which I think is fine, cause if we didn't make 30% more, you guys would marry each other.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
Someone stole my wallet last week. The guy called me up and he was mad at me. He was like 'you gotta get your finances together. You got no cash, your credit cards are maxed out. You don't even have minutes on your calling card. I had to use my card to call you.'
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I actually love 'Saturday Night Live,' like a sports fan watches their favorite team to see how they're doing. I know the players and the writers, I've known several people on that show for a number of years.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
Art is socialism but life is capitalism.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.'
Mike Birbiglia
Image
You can always tell who went to catholic school, because they're atheists.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I've read that Steven Wright's style was born out of genuine nervousness.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.
Mike Birbiglia