Quote

I used to think I was a little unstable, and then I met every girl I've ever dated.

Mike Birbiglia

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Mike Birbiglia
Age: 46
Born: 1978
Born: June 20
Actor
Comedian
Executive Producer
Film Director
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Ever
Little
Every
Dated
Think
Unstable
Thinking
Mets
Girl
Used
Littles

More quotes by Mike Birbiglia

Image
I couldn't recommend more that people put themselves in a situation where they can see a lot of work that they admire, and for free.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I just don't give off a great first impression.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
The key is to do what you love.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I think the reason why I'm so alluring to networks is because on the surface I'm like a quintessential relatable, boring white guy. A great many sitcoms have been anchored by a boring white guy, so I feel like what they want to mine from me are my more generic qualities.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I try to think up material that might apply to the subjects they are studying. How many mitochondria does it take to power a cell? One. Because mitochondria are the powerhouse of the cell. Not ready for prime time, that one.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
A girl offered me E at the club. 'Have you ever done E?' 'I watch E.'
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I don't drink a lot. My family calls me an old soul. And my friends call me a pussy.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I take the subway four times a day, or close to it. I just love the subway! My grandfather worked as an electrician when they were digging the subway.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I think our culture views success as visibility, being seen as being successful. Whereas I've learned that success is rooted in helping and connecting to other people, and knowing where you can contribute. I've kind of spent my thirties doing that, because in my twenties I was seeking any kind of success.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I always try to attack the most honest issues I can in my comedy.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I love pizza so much, I would marry pizza, but it would just be an elaborate ploy to eat her whole family at the reception.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
The key to eating healthy is not eating any food that has a TV commercial.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
Does anyone know a word that rhymes with shark?
Mike Birbiglia
Image
My family isn't really Italian. We're more like Olive Garden Italian.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I'm walking out my door to get like a Snapple, and someone's like 'yo man, you want to buy some heroin?' 'No... got any Snapple?'
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I read recently that women still make 30% less than men in the workplace. Which I think is fine, cause if we didn't make 30% more, you guys would marry each other.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
Art is socialism but life is capitalism.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I find my fans are really funny people. Most comedians can't say that about their fans.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I feel like people have more in common than the news reports.
Mike Birbiglia
Image
I almost can't even put to words how happy I am that I got married.
Mike Birbiglia