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An old racetrack joke reminds you that your program contains all the winners' names. I stare at my typewriter keys with the same thought.
Mignon McLaughlin
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Mignon McLaughlin
Age: 70 †
Born: 1913
Born: June 6
Died: 1983
Died: December 20
Journalist
Writer
the United States of America
Program
Stare
Names
Reminds
Thought
Contains
Writing
Winner
Staring
Racetrack
Joke
Typewriter
Jokes
Typewriters
Keys
Winners
More quotes by Mignon McLaughlin
Neurotic: someone who can go from the bottom to the top, and back again, without ever once touching the middle.
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When women feel they have learned to forgive their mothers - and men, their fathers - all it usually means is that they've decided to allow themselves the same kind of behavior.
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The ideal home: big enough for you to hear the children, but not very well.
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Money is much more exciting than anything it buys.
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Forget about calories - everything makes thin people thinner, and fat people fatter.
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We cough because we can't help it, but others do it on purpose.
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When the pressures really mount, the neurotic must choose: Shall he have a good cry, or set fire to his neighbor's house?
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Society honors its living conformists and its dead troublemakers.
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The fault we admit to is seldom the fault we have, but it has a certain relationship to it, a somewhat similar shape, like that of a sleeve to an arm.
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We climb mountains because they are there, and worship God because He is not.
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We semaphore from ship to ship, but they're sinking, too.
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Neurotic quarrels always have the same theme-song: Hate me and get it over with.
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What's for dinner is the only question many husbands ask their wives, and the only one to which they care about the answer.
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You will turn over many a futile new leaf till you learn we must all write on scratched-out pages.
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Whether or not you love television, you've got to admit that it certainly loves itself.
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The young do not need God, and the old cannot find Him.
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A sense of humor is a major defense against minor troubles.
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We always prefer war on our own terms to peace on someone else's.
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Women usually love what they buy, yet hate two-thirds of what is in their closets.
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When the pain is great enough, we will let anyone be doctor.
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