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Trump has officially changed his name to Ronald because he's such a clown, and in sympathy his toupée is changing its name to Bozo.
Michael R. Burch
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Michael R. Burch
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: February 19
Poet
the United States of America
Changed
Name
Names
Officially
Ronald
Clown
Sympathy
Changing
Trump
More quotes by Michael R. Burch
When Donald Trump becomes president, he'll fly on a jumbo jet rebadged Hair Force One. It will be oversized to contain his massive ego, and will have all the latest and greatest blowdryer technology.
Michael R. Burch
Every political card played by Jeb Bush has been Trumped every political note played by The Donald has been Trumpeted.
Michael R. Burch
The truth can finally be told: Donald Trump's autism was caused by a vaccination that went terribly wrong this explains why he can't relate to other people.
Michael R. Burch
Donald Trump isn't really running for president, come on! This is obviously a new reality show, Celebrity Presidential Apprentice. It ends with the incompetent celebrity being berated, humiliated, then unceremoniously fired.
Michael R. Burch
When I was being bullied, I had to learn not to judge myself by the opinions of intolerant morons. Then I felt much better.
Michael R. Burch
Donald Trump really is a fan of the Bible, except that it's far too long for him to read. So he just released a new, improved version, the Gospel According to Trump. It reads: I, Donald Trump, am God. Praise, worship, and adore Me as I do Myself. Then all shall be Great, as I am Great. The End.
Michael R. Burch
Donald Trump has taken the Peter Principle to unprecedented heights. Or is it depths?
Michael R. Burch
Trump appeals to right-wingnuts because when the going gets tough, they wig out.
Michael R. Burch
How can the Bible be infallible when from Genesis to Revelation slavery is commanded and condoned, but never condemned?
Michael R. Burch
Hell hath no fury like a frustrated fundamentalist whose God condemned him to hell for having impure thoughts.
Michael R. Burch
Teddy Roosevelt spoke softly and carried a big stick Donald Trump speaks loudly and carries a big shtick.
Michael R. Burch
Donald Trump accused Huma Abedin of sharing state secrets with her husband. I think Trump clearly lacks a sense of Huma.
Michael R. Burch
Many presidents have believed in God, but Donald Trump evidently believes that he is God.
Michael R. Burch
Did evangelical Christians mistake Donald Trump's hairpiece for a halo, while ignoring the obvious signs that he worships Mammon?
Michael R. Burch
Rand Paul tried hard to upstage Donald Trump at the first debate, talking tough about his guns and his right not to register them. But with his pixie-ish perm, Paul does not impress me as the gunslinger type. Rand Paul is the RuPaul of politics. He would do better to defend his right to carry an unregistered blow-dryer and curling irons.
Michael R. Burch
Trump appeals to the disaffected by loudly trumpet-ing what they want to hear: other people are always the problem, and the solution is to either put them in their proper place or get rid of them.
Michael R. Burch
C'm'on lefties! Admit that Trump has been very tough on China. He has been especially tough on Chinese kids who slave away in sweatboxes, making his clothing lines.
Michael R. Burch
If brevity is the soul of wit then brevity and levity are the whole of it.
Michael R. Burch
Donald Trump has filed so many bankruptcies and busted so many companies that his children now have receding heir lines.
Michael R. Burch
If God is good half the Bible is libel.
Michael R. Burch
