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Teddy Roosevelt spoke softly and carried a big stick Donald Trump speaks loudly and carries a big shtick.
Michael R. Burch
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Michael R. Burch
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: February 19
Poet
the United States of America
Teddy
Speaks
Roosevelt
Stick
Sticks
Softly
Donald
Carries
Trump
Spokes
Bigs
Carrie
Shtick
Speak
Spoke
Loudly
Carried
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Hell hath no fury like a frustrated fundamentalist whose God condemned him to hell for having impure thoughts.
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Trump appeals to the disaffected by loudly trumpet-ing what they want to hear: other people are always the problem, and the solution is to either put them in their proper place or get rid of them.
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President Obama contends that charges he is not really an American have been trumped up by you-know-who.
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The truth can finally be told: Donald Trump's autism was caused by a vaccination that went terribly wrong this explains why he can't relate to other people.
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Donald Trump really is a fan of the Bible, except that it's far too long for him to read. So he just released a new, improved version, the Gospel According to Trump. It reads: I, Donald Trump, am God. Praise, worship, and adore Me as I do Myself. Then all shall be Great, as I am Great. The End.
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Trump claims he'd be the best jobs president that God ever created. But isn't his claim to fame firing people?
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C'm'on lefties! Admit that Trump has been very tough on China. He has been especially tough on Chinese kids who slave away in sweatboxes, making his clothing lines.
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Many presidents have believed in God, but Donald Trump evidently believes that he is God.
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Trump's last name is an omen that he'll win the Republican nomination, since trump means triumph. One might suggest that this will constitute the triumph of insanity over reason, except that none of the other Republican candidates make any sense either. Trump just makes them seem less crazy by comparison.
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If God is good half the Bible is libel.
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Trump has officially changed his name to Ronald because he's such a clown, and in sympathy his toupée is changing its name to Bozo.
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How can the Bible be infallible when from Genesis to Revelation slavery is commanded and condoned, but never condemned?
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When Donald Trump becomes president, he'll fly on a jumbo jet rebadged Hair Force One. It will be oversized to contain his massive ego, and will have all the latest and greatest blowdryer technology.
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Donald Trump has filed so many bankruptcies and busted so many companies that his children now have receding heir lines.
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