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If brevity is the soul of wit then brevity and levity are the whole of it.

Michael R. Burch

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Michael R. Burch
Age: 66
Born: 1958
Born: February 19
Poet
the United States of America
Levity
Brevity
Wit
Soul
Whole

More quotes by Michael R. Burch

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Many presidents have believed in God, but Donald Trump evidently believes that he is God.
Michael R. Burch
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Trump appeals to the disaffected by loudly trumpet-ing what they want to hear: other people are always the problem, and the solution is to either put them in their proper place or get rid of them.
Michael R. Burch
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Donald Trump isn't really running for president, come on! This is obviously a new reality show, Celebrity Presidential Apprentice. It ends with the incompetent celebrity being berated, humiliated, then unceremoniously fired.
Michael R. Burch
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When Donald Trump becomes president, he'll fly on a jumbo jet rebadged Hair Force One. It will be oversized to contain his massive ego, and will have all the latest and greatest blowdryer technology.
Michael R. Burch
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The truth can finally be told: Donald Trump's autism was caused by a vaccination that went terribly wrong this explains why he can't relate to other people.
Michael R. Burch
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Rand Paul tried hard to upstage Donald Trump at the first debate, talking tough about his guns and his right not to register them. But with his pixie-ish perm, Paul does not impress me as the gunslinger type. Rand Paul is the RuPaul of politics. He would do better to defend his right to carry an unregistered blow-dryer and curling irons.
Michael R. Burch
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Abbesses' recesses are not for excesses!
Michael R. Burch
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Donald Trump has filed so many bankruptcies and busted so many companies that his children now have receding heir lines.
Michael R. Burch
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It's simply not true that Donald Trump has no experience in foreign affairs. Hell, two of his foreign affairs resulted in marriages!
Michael R. Burch
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Trump claims he'd be the best jobs president that God ever created. But isn't his claim to fame firing people?
Michael R. Burch
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It's not that every leaf must finally fall, it's just that we can never catch them all.
Michael R. Burch
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Every political card played by Jeb Bush has been Trumped every political note played by The Donald has been Trumpeted.
Michael R. Burch
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Did evangelical Christians mistake Donald Trump's hairpiece for a halo, while ignoring the obvious signs that he worships Mammon?
Michael R. Burch
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When I was being bullied, I had to learn not to judge myself by the opinions of intolerant morons. Then I felt much better.
Michael R. Burch
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If God is good half the Bible is libel.
Michael R. Burch
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Teddy Roosevelt spoke softly and carried a big stick Donald Trump speaks loudly and carries a big shtick.
Michael R. Burch
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C'm'on lefties! Admit that Trump has been very tough on China. He has been especially tough on Chinese kids who slave away in sweatboxes, making his clothing lines.
Michael R. Burch
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Donald Trump really is a fan of the Bible, except that it's far too long for him to read. So he just released a new, improved version, the Gospel According to Trump. It reads: I, Donald Trump, am God. Praise, worship, and adore Me as I do Myself. Then all shall be Great, as I am Great. The End.
Michael R. Burch
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President Obama contends that charges he is not really an American have been trumped up by you-know-who.
Michael R. Burch
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Donald Trump accused Huma Abedin of sharing state secrets with her husband. I think Trump clearly lacks a sense of Huma.
Michael R. Burch