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I feel no obligation to teach my readers anything, to impart any sort of wisdom, to teach any sort of lesson, to instill any sort of morality. All I'm trying to do is make them and their parents laugh.

Michael Ian Black

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Michael Ian Black
Age: 53
Born: 1971
Born: August 12
Actor
Comedian
Film Director
Podcaster
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Chicago
Illinois
Sort
Obligation
Wisdom
Morality
Teach
Laugh
Anything
Lessons
Feel
Reader
Instill
Feels
Laughing
Impart
Trying
Parents
Readers
Make
Parent
Lesson

More quotes by Michael Ian Black

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I'm very introverted, so it requires a huge effort for me to put on a smile and extend a hand and accept compliments. I would much rather be insulted than complimented any day.
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I think people just love to win.
Michael Ian Black
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The Atkins' diet is where you eat bacon for six or seven months...and the end result is that you lose weight. Because you're dead.
Michael Ian Black
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That's been my fear all along. That I'm not enough, and I still don't trust at all that I am.
Michael Ian Black
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I take my coffee like I take my women... strong... black... and proud.
Michael Ian Black
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There's things I know I'm good at, and those things interest me less and less. I learn a lot more from doing it wrong than I do from doing it right.
Michael Ian Black
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Lordy, lordy, lordy do I love money. It is a character flaw, no doubt, one that springs from a panicked childhood in which I always felt as if our family was only a couple missed child support payments from being tossed onto the pitiless streets of our suburban New Jersey town.
Michael Ian Black
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My goal is to work. That's the goal of most actors or performers: to work and keep working, and do the best you can, and keep growing and changing, trying to improve your craft.
Michael Ian Black
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The illustrators work so much harder on the books than the writers do. I mean, that's so much work doing what they do, and it's terrible for them.
Michael Ian Black
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I don't necessarily self-identify as a writer, 'cause it implies a certain level of intelligence.
Michael Ian Black
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I never really understood what was expected of me as a man, or how I was supposed to interact with women, but worse, with other guys. I did not relate to them.
Michael Ian Black
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Kids love to be silly, they love to laugh, so I think it was natural for my kids to like the sort of books that I write - and it's the only kinds of books I'm capable of writing.
Michael Ian Black
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Whatever I write I publish. Because that's where the money is.
Michael Ian Black
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If you say I'm going to be an actor, but I'll get a teaching degree just in case, when things get hard, you'll just be a teacher and that's how you get stuck.
Michael Ian Black
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Things you never thought were going to turn into something end up being the most important things in your life. You have to learn to not try to control it.
Michael Ian Black
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There is no word for feeling nostalgic about the future, but that's what a parent's tears often are, a nostalgia for something that has not yet occurred. They are the pain of hope, the helplessness of hope, and finally, the surrender to hope.
Michael Ian Black
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Shuffling really isn't something you should be doing on your deathbed.
Michael Ian Black
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I thought I'd be living a much more bohemian life and be very poor. I never thought I'd do comedy or be married living in the suburbs. Every time I try to plan my life out it just doesn't come to pass, and I think that's a great experience.
Michael Ian Black
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I loved Dungeons & Dragons. Actually, not so much the actual playing as the creation of characters and the opportunity to roll twenty-sided dice. I loved those pouches of dice Dungeon Masters would trundle around, loved choosing what I was going to be: warrior, wizard, dwarf, thief.
Michael Ian Black
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As an actor, you can show up on a set and be on a TV show for three or four years, or whatever it is and, by the end of it, you just want to do something else.
Michael Ian Black