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Worrying, obsessing, and controlling are illusions. They are tricks we play on ourselves.

Melody Beattie

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Melody Beattie
Age: 76
Born: 1948
Born: May 26
Author
Writer
St Paul
Minnesota
Controlling
Illusions
Worrying
Tricks
Illusion
Worry
Play
Obsessing

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Much of the time, the things we feel guilty about are not our issues. Another person behaves inappropriately or in some way violates our boundaries. We challenge the behavior, and the person gets angry and defensive. Then we feel guilty.
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Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.
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Letting go helps us to live in a more peaceful state of mind and helps restore our balance. It allows others to be responsible for themselves and for us to take our hands off situations that do not belong to us. This frees us from unnecessary stress.
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Choosing to take responsibility for ourselves and for the consequences our choices create looks like hard work, but it really sets us free.
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Whatever we try to control does have control over us and our life.
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Panic, not the task, is the enemy.
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I gave three years of my life to take care of my dying mother who had Alzheimer's disease. Being there for her every need for three years might have looked codependent but it wasn't because it was what I wanted to do.
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The new year stands before us, like a chapter in a book, waiting to be written. We can help write that story by setting goals.
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We are on a very rich emotional and physical journey on this planet.
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Codependents are reactionaries. They overreact. They under-react. But rarely do they act. They react to the problems, pains, lives, and behaviors of others. They react to their own problems, pains, and behaviors.
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Gratitude can turn a meal into a feast.
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Today, I will let go. I will stop trying to control everything. I will stop trying to make myself be and do better, and I will let myself be.
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Money is not evil. There is no scarcity, except in our mind and attitudes. And what we believe we deserve will be about what we shall receive.
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What's a codependent? The answer's easy. They're some of the most loving, caring people I know.
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Today I will not wait for someone to come to my aid. I'm not helpless. Although help may come, I'm my own rescuer. My relationships will dramatically improve when I stop rescuing others and stop expecting others to rescue me.
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Do we really have the right to take care of ourselves? Do we really have the right to set boundaries? Do we really have the right to be direct and say what we need to say? You bet we do.
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Our best problem-solving resource is peace. Solutions arise easily and naturally out of a peaceful state.
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You don't have to search so hard for meaning and destiny. If you focus on keeping yourself clear and in balance and you live from your heart, destiny and your highest-good path will unfold naturally at your feet.
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We have as much time as we need.
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