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Actually I never did stand up. I'm not that funny.

Maynard James Keenan

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Maynard James Keenan
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: April 17
Composer
Guitarist
Musician
Record Producer
Singer
Ravenna
Ohio
James Herbert Keenan
Never
Stand
Actually
Funny

More quotes by Maynard James Keenan

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I think there's a reason why wine figures into so many religions. There's something transcendent about it. It's sort of the way that music is more than the sum of its parts. You have all these elements that make up the terroir that wine can communicate.
Maynard James Keenan
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It's in my blood. My great-grandfather made wine and it's a tradition I want to pass on to my son.
Maynard James Keenan
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We're five people, five individuals who came together to create something, to make music and to complete each other musically, to form a perfect circle.
Maynard James Keenan
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I think people in general have neglected to learn about history.
Maynard James Keenan
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But then it hasn't really been a focus of our government to make us an educated people.
Maynard James Keenan
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Life is too short not to create something with every breath we draw.
Maynard James Keenan
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Yeah, because I think it's more important just to inspire people to wake up one day and pick up a book and start feeling it out for themselves.
Maynard James Keenan
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Because as an only child, you have your own little world.
Maynard James Keenan
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This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality. Embrace this moment, remember: we are eternal all this pain is an illusion.
Maynard James Keenan
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If the education of our kids comes from radio, television, newspapers - if that's where they get most of their knowledge from, and not from the schools, then the powers that be are definitely in charge, because they own all those outlets.
Maynard James Keenan
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Just in general, any government throughout history hasn't really wanted its people to be educated, because then they couldn't control them as easily.
Maynard James Keenan
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We are eternal. All this pain is an illusion.
Maynard James Keenan
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Jesus Christ, why dont you come save my life. Open my eyes and blind me with your light and your lies.
Maynard James Keenan
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Cold silence has a tendency to atrophy any sense of compassion between supposed lovers
Maynard James Keenan
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Put a small child in a playpen with an apple and a bunny. If s/he eats the apple and plays with the bunny, s/he's normalbut if s/he eats the bunny and plays with the apple, I'll buy you a new car. Somewhere along the line we must have been TAUGHT to do the wrong thing.
Maynard James Keenan
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Finding beauty in the dissonance.
Maynard James Keenan
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Standing above the crowd, He had a voice so strong and loud And I swallowed his façade 'cause I'm so Eager to identify with Someone above the ground, Someone who seemed to feel the same, Someone prepared to lead the way, with Someone who would die for me.
Maynard James Keenan
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Shows are really strange. Sometimes you really don't know what to expect
Maynard James Keenan
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I think the biggest problem working with me would be that I'm an only child, and so I have an internal dialogue that goes on that I just assume you can hear.
Maynard James Keenan
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Actors have these delicate appendages called Egos.
Maynard James Keenan