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English rain feels obligatory, like paperwork. It dampens already damn days and slicks the stones.
Maureen Johnson
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Maureen Johnson
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: February 16
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Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
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Damn
English
Stones
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Obligatory
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More quotes by Maureen Johnson
Debbie had to get up and slice me a thick piece of cake before she could answer. And I do mean thick. Harry Potter volume seven thick. I could have knocked out a burglar with this piece of cake. Once I tasted it, though, it seemed just the right size.
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What are you? I asked. I'm the Ghost of the Night Before Exams. And how long did it take you to come up with that? Jazza asked. I'm a busy man, he replied.
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Sometimes people graduate but they don't leave. They hang around for years, for no reason. I would think of ghosts like that, I decided.
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I have no phobias. Phobias are irrational. My fears are rational and CAREFULLY CULTIVATED, like roses.
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Some nutter's gone and pulled a Jack the Ripper.
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Life is always going to be a series of ouch-making moments, and the question was, was I going to go all fetal position, or was I going to woman up? I went into fetal position on the bed to think about this. Fetal position turned out to be very comfortable.
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I may have been a complete lunatic, but I was a complete lunatic with manners.
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I guess life is full of maybes.
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I had one class in the morning, the mysteriously named Further Maths. It was two hours long and so deeply frightening that I think I went into a trance.
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You've never told me about your love life, Scarlett. You're a very pretty girl. You must have a boy shacked up somewhere for your personal delights. I'd bet it's a booky one, overtones of Harry Potter and a lot of black T-shirts.
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This is England, he explained. Tell someone it's a procedure, and they'll believe you. The pointless procedure is one of our great natural resources.
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One of them hung a pink bra from our lighting fixture. I left it there. It was a nice bra
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There is no normal. I've never met a normal person. The concept is flawed. It implies that there is only one way people are supposed to be, and that can't possible be true. Human experience is far too varied.
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I feel warm and reassured, I whispered. He's like Santa.
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Tell me what you want, what you really, really want, he said. Braiiinnnnssss, we said in unison.
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The locker at the end of her bed had no lock, and one of the hinges was busted. She opened it up. There was a thing in it. The thing might have been a sandwich at some point, or an animal, or a human hand...but what it was now was fuzzy and putrid. A minute later, Ginny was down the stairs, out the door, and gone.
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Every time you try to flirt with her, a puppy dies.
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Why are Americans so fascinated by Ireland? Keith asked... you all think you're Irish. What's the appeal? Do you like the accent more? Is it all the magical rocks? Oh, look, a lepĀrechaun.
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People always say they can't do things, that they're impossible. They just haven't been creative enough.
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Sometimes artist like to catch themselves looking out, let the world see them for once. It's a signature. This one is a very bold one. But this is also a witnessing. We want to remember, and we want to be remembered. That's why we paint.
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