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There is no normal. I've never met a normal person. The concept is flawed. It implies that there is only one way people are supposed to be, and that can't possible be true. Human experience is far too varied.

Maureen Johnson

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Maureen Johnson
Age: 51
Born: 1973
Born: February 16
Author
Novelist
Writer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
Never
Possible
Varied
People
Experience
Implies
True
Flawed
Persons
Concept
Person
Mets
Human
Concepts
Humans
Supposed
Way
Normal

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It was fine, I said stiffly. We played Mouse Trap. Is that what they're calling it these days? she asked, throwing me a terrible grin. I have to go give Rachel a quick bath. Feel free to make yourself some cocoa or whatever you like! She stopped short of adding ...future child-bride of my only son.
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Don't get stabbed. It makes everything awkward.
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This is England, he explained. Tell someone it's a procedure, and they'll believe you. The pointless procedure is one of our great natural resources.
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They weren't pressed together as closely as normal, but his shoulder bumped hers, then remained there. It was very subtle, and possibly even accidental, but it was enough.
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I could pretend, at least, and if I pretended long enough, maybe I could make it into a reality.
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No sausage? he asked. Apparently my pork consumption habits were a matter of public record.
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Hey! Jack the Wanker! Over here! I want your autograph!
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WORTH IT and perfect are different things. No one’s perfect, yet in romance, everyone becomes WORTH IT. And that’s the trick.
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Debbie had to get up and slice me a thick piece of cake before she could answer. And I do mean thick. Harry Potter volume seven thick. I could have knocked out a burglar with this piece of cake. Once I tasted it, though, it seemed just the right size.
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I had always assumed the weekend was a holy tradition, respected by good people everywhere. Not so at Wexford.
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With that, I splashed some water on my face, fixed on a smile, and stepped out. I would find Jerome. I would make him explain to me what I was missing. We would laugh, then we would kiss with tongue, and all would be well.
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Something about her suggested that her leisure activities included wrestling large woodland animals and banging bricks together.
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I feel warm and reassured, I whispered. He's like Santa.
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You're...a demon hunter?' 'It's not as exciting as it sounds,' he said. 'There is a surprising amount of paperwork involved.
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English rain feels obligatory, like paperwork. It dampens already damn days and slicks the stones.
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One of them hung a pink bra from our lighting fixture. I left it there. It was a nice bra
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These houses had been plunked down with an alarming randomness -- unevenly spaced, on crooked lines, like whoever had designed the place had said, We'll just follow this cat, and wherever he sits down, we'll build something.
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Prefects. I had learned this one. Student council types, but with superpowers. They who must be obeyed.
Maureen Johnson
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I guess life is full of maybes.
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Life is always going to be a series of ouch-making moments, and the question was, was I going to go all fetal position, or was I going to woman up? I went into fetal position on the bed to think about this. Fetal position turned out to be very comfortable.
Maureen Johnson