Quote

I'm glad that life isn't like a Christmas song, because if my friends and I were building a snowman and it suddenly came alive when we put a hat on it, I'd probably freak and stab it to death with an icicle.

Matthew Perry

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Matthew Perry
Age: 55
Born: 1969
Born: August 19
Actor
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Writer
Williamstown
Massachusetts
Matthew Langford Perry
Death
Suddenly
Life
Glad
Icicle
Like
Building
Icicles
Probably
Snowman
Alive
Stab
Came
Freak
Friends
Hats
Song
Christmas

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I have a well-documented history of trouble with intimacy.
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After I got my first laugh on stage, I was hooked.
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A lot of people think that addiction is a choice. A lot of people think it's a matter of will. That has not been my experience. I don't find it to have anything to do with strength.
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I went to a high school that didn't have many people in it. There were, like, 60 people in my senior class. There was a group of cool kids and a group of really dorky kids, and I was probably the coolest of the really dorky kids.
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I got sober because I was worried I was going to die next year.
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To be a comedian, you have to have some darkness behind it. I certainly draw on my past, and it helps.
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There are two sides to being pigeonholed. There's, 'Oh, no, I'm going to be Chandler for the rest of my life,' but there's also the fact that getting to play Chandler opened up doors to me. It's now my job to find things that shake it up a little bit.
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I need a woman to have a quirky sense of humor. There's a bunch of jokes I use, and if she doesn't get them, she's probably not for me.
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I'm just glad that the whole John Wayne persona of a man is sort of old school now, because I'd never be able to do that. If that was the going rate today, I wouldn't be working.
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I have a huge interest in hockey because I grew up in Canada, where it's kind of the law that you love hockey.
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Women always think that I'm Chandler, so if I don't joke around for half an hour they think that something's wrong. Then I explain that I don't have comedy writers scripting everything I'm saying at this particular dinner.
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If I hadn't had the experience of being famous, I would have searched for it my whole life. I would have just gone on and on trying to find it.
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They say that women like a man who can make them laugh, and I find that if you can make a woman laugh on the first and second dates, then you're doing well.
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To me, writing is remembering something funny that happened, or maybe something I said seven years ago.
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So I'm reading a book on my new iPad, but can't the iPad read it for me? Do I have to do everything?
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I was like: I'm going to ask her [Julia Roberts] out but I'm going to be very nervous about it. Then she said yes, I got even more nervous.
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I love the idea of 'the one' but I actually believe that there isn't a Miss Right. There are 12,000 Miss Rights out there and it's all timing.
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In a perfect world, my tennis game gets better. I have kids and a beautiful wife and live on some hill somewhere that's not in Los Angeles. And the script that Tom Hanks just barely turned down gets in my hands.
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I am fine with the fact that some of my hair is gray. If it was all gray overnight, that would be a scary thing.
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I certainly like the rumour that I was the father of Elizabeth Hurley's baby. It made me think I could impregnate women in a different way to everyone else. Elizabeth and I were never alone in a room together, so I must be a very powerful man indeed. Actually, I'm thinking of suing the baby!
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