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John Boehner is the ultimate Beltway hack, a man whose unmatched and self-serving skill at political survival has made him, after two decades in Washington, the hairy blue mold on the American congressional sandwich.

Matt Taibbi

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Matt Taibbi
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: March 2
Author
Editorial Columnist
Journalist
Writer
Matthew C. Taibbi
Matthew Taibbi
Made
Blue
Sandwiches
Men
Skills
Mold
Beltway
Ultimate
Skill
Unmatched
Whose
Serving
Hairy
American
Washington
Hack
Political
Decades
Congressional
Two
John
Hacks
Self
Survival
Sandwich

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Everything in America is so uniform. In Russia, everywhere you go is completely insane.
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What we have now is a situation where politicians get a whole bunch of money from mainly business interests. Then once they hold that office, they spend all their time in office paying back over and over again those campaign contributions through various favors and contracts and that sort of thing.
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At least Bank of America got its name right. The ultimate Too Big to Fail bank really is America, a hypergluttonous ward of the state whose limitless fraud and criminal conspiracies we'll all be paying for until the end of time.
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The failure to work out sensible budgets makes it impossible for government agencies to make long-term plans, and instead leaves them scrambling to spend money in the short term.
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The mistake our politicians so often make with these industry leaders is in thinking they are interested in, or respectful of, the power of government. All they want is to keep stealing. If you can offer them the government’s seal of approval on that, they’ll take it. But if you can’t, well, they’ll take that too.
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One of the great cliches of campaign journalism is the notion that American elections have long since ceased to be about issues and ideas.
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If anything, the bailouts actually hindered lending, as banks became more like house pets that grow fat and lazy on two guaranteed meals a day than wild animals that have to go out into the jungle and hunt for opportunities in order to eat.
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There is a reason it used to be a crime in the Confederate states to teach a slave to read: Literacy is power.
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Once you give an NFL player permission to have thoughts, you invite all kinds of mischief.
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At root, the Tea Party is nothing more than a them-versus-us thing.
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In America, it takes about two weeks in the limelight for the whole country to think you've been around for years.
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The world's most powerful investment bank is a great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity, relentlessly jamming its blood funnel into anything that smells like money.
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The Congressional Record will forever show that [Obamacare] was passed in a romper room of overgrown children seemingly barely old enough to keep from peeing on themselves.
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It would be inaccurate to say the Tea Partiers are racists. What they are, in truth, are narcissists.
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Over the years, many in the public have become numb to news of financial corruption, partly because too many of these stories involve banker-on-banker crime.
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I think America has the best assholes in the world. I defy the Belgians or the Japanese to produce something like a Donald Trump.
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Capitalism is a system for determining objective value.
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The problem with the Tea Party is that it's been used in a way that scares people into supporting an agenda that's counter to their own interests.
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