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A woman is like beer. They look good, they smell good, and you'd step over your own mother just to get one!

Matt Groening

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Matt Groening
Age: 54
Actor
Animator
Author
Cartoonist
Comics Artist
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Portland
Oregon
Matthew Abram Groening
Matthew Groening
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Looks
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Beer
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More quotes by Matt Groening

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When you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all.
Matt Groening
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Masturbation is nothing to be ashamed of. It's nothing to be particularly proud of, either.
Matt Groening
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I have less to do with 'The Simpsons' every season, but I stick my nose in here and there. Basically, it's just trying to keep the characters consistent and making sure the show has a soul.
Matt Groening
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I know for a fact, obviously, because my kids grew up watching the show, that there are some things they are introduced to from 'The Simpsons', and then later in life they see the thing we're parodying. My kids had not seen 'Casablanca,' and we'd done parodies of 'Casablanca.'
Matt Groening
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I had been drawing my weekly comic strip, 'Life in Hell,' for about five years when I got a call from Jim Brooks, who was developing 'The Tracey Ullman Show' for the brand-new Fox network. He wanted me to come in and pitch an idea for doing little cartoons on that show.
Matt Groening
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When will people learn? Democracy doesn't work! (Homer Simpson)
Matt Groening
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With Futurama, I wanted to do unrequited love, and David Cohen agreed, and although our original plan was never to have Fry and Leela get together, we finally just said, You can only string the fans along so far.
Matt Groening
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'Adult Swim' on the Cartoon Network is unbelievable. And 'South Park' continues to do great stuff. And 'Family Guy' and the various other Seth MacFarlane projects are amazing.
Matt Groening
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The conundrum that I face on a daily basis is that I have two sons who have grown up watching 'The Simpsons,' so they know exactly what buttons to push. They know how Bart irritates Homer, and they use these lines against me to tell me that I'm not funny anymore.
Matt Groening
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Science fiction and comedy are generally a pretty bumpy mix.
Matt Groening
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The French are funny, sex is funny, and comedies are funny, yet no French sex comedies are funny.
Matt Groening
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I plead alignment to the flakes of the untitled snakes of a merry cow and to the republicrats for which they scam: one nacho, underpants with licorice and jugs of wine for owls.
Matt Groening
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Warning signs that lover is bored: 1. Passionless kisses 2. Frequent sighing 3. Moved, left no forwarding address.
Matt Groening
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I like all of the early relationship strips that were collected in 'Love Is Hell,' where I pretended to be an expert in relationships and did comics like 'The Nine Types of Boyfriends,' 'Sixteen Ways to End a Relationship,' 'Twenty-Four Things Not to Say in Bed,' and other arbitrarily numbered lists.
Matt Groening
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I don't have to be careful, I've got a gun.
Matt Groening
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America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well ... all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky starts we don't live in Paraguay!
Matt Groening
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Families are about love overcoming emotional torture.
Matt Groening
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If people only knew how much I secretly hated them, they'd love me for holding it in.
Matt Groening
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I judge my life by how miserable it used to be. If I could pay my rent, I was deliriously happy. Now I'm deliriously happy all the time.
Matt Groening
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The world ends when I die. And as far as I'm concerned, the rest of the universe might as well call it a day too.
Matt Groening