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If you are going to be rude, be quick about it.

Mason Cooley

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Mason Cooley
Age: 75 †
Born: 1927
Born: January 1
Died: 2002
Died: July 25
Aphorist
Rude
Quick
Gone
Going
Rudeness

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Beauty is lyrical. Ugliness is elegiac.
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A quick smile is more seductive than a slinky dress.
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Rule of art: let half-blind purpose lead you.
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Modern literature seduces with insults, riddles, and inside stories.
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Every doctrine has a theory of the beginning.
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The popping of bubblegum discourages the most determined lecher.
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The nonsense that charms is close to sense.
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When a man bores a woman, she complains. When a woman bores a man, he ignores her.
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The madness of love can always be suspended--to cook dinner or catch a plane, for instance.
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In middle age, going naked contributes little to public enjoyment.
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When you can't figure out what to do, it's time for a nap.
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Like an electric tea-kettle, pornography comes to a boil very fast.
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Wit puts politicians at risk.
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I keep renaming my motives, but continue doing the same things.
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A neurotic can neither enjoy his illusions nor give them up.
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People who behave at forty as they did at twenty must sometimes wonder why their charm is not working.
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Ideologies can survive hostility, but not indifference.
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Enough is ever-receding.
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Saying I feel guilty is a mere form of words. Saying I feel ashamed is not.
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