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Money is a better tonic than Geritol.

Mason Cooley

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Mason Cooley
Age: 75 †
Born: 1927
Born: January 1
Died: 2002
Died: July 25
Aphorist
Tonic
Money
Better

More quotes by Mason Cooley

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Self-criticism expands the opportunities for discourse and eliminates the need for an adversary.
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Rage against the world, if you like, but quietly, or the Guardians will awake.
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In the street, the gaze of desire is furtive or menacing.
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Lonely people keep up a ceaseless flow of commentary on themselves.
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Love Songs Now: Fewer broken hearts, more sexual misery.
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Cruelty is softened by fear, not pity.
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Analysis is more likely to adjust evidence than to adjust itself.
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Rule of criticism: only attend to the shape, and the purpose will manifest itself.
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Irony regards every simple truth as a challenge.
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Either offer me something I really like, or stop trying to tempt me.
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The noble style immobilizes its subjects.
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My love grows wide and shallow in an effort to spread my losses.
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I create my social existence by earning and spending.
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When lying to someone, look him straight in the eye.
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Talk shows are proof that conversation is dead.
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Old and young disbelieve one another's truths.
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Eccentricity: strength of character doubling back on itself.
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A dense undergrowth of extension cords sustains my upper world of lights, music, and machines of comfort.
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If I could do my life over, I would try to cleanse at least my pleasures of self-pity.
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I answered my father's demands for sympathy with silence.
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