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Every instance of heartbreak can teach us powerful lessons about creating the kind of love we really want.

Martha Beck

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Martha Beck
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: November 29
Author
Journalist
Sociologist
Provo
Utah
Love
Healing
Lessons
Creating
Teach
Powerful
Every
Kind
Heartbreak
Really
Instance

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The really potent part of love is that it allows you to carry around beliefs about yourself that make you feel special, desirable, precious, innately good. Your lover couldn't have seen [these qualities] in you, even temporarily, if they weren't part of your essential being.
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A true leader is not someone who feels fully informed but someone who continuously receives insight and guidance.
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Imagine what you'd do if it absolutely didn't matter what people thought of you. Got it? Good. Never go back.
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Conflict in close relationships is not only inevitable, it's essential. Intimacy connects people who are inevitably different.
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In the pursuit of Knowledge, every day something is added. In the practice of the Way, every day something is dropped. Less and less do you need to force things, until finally you arrive at non-action. When nothing is done, nothing is left undone.
Martha Beck
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Don’t hide love. If you feel it, express it-not to demand that others love you back, but simply to live outwardly the best of what you feel inwardly. The worst that can happen to your heart is not rejection by another person but failure to act on the love you feel.
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You shine for who you are ... because no one can steal your light.
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Where your attention goes, your life goes.
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Hopeful thinking can get you out of your fear zone and into your appreciation zone.
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What laughter is to childhood, sex is to adolescence.
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Do whatever work feeds your true self, even if it’s not a safe bet, even if it’s like a crazy risk, even if everyone in your life tells you you’re wrong or bad or crazy.
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Criticism is an alluring substitute for creation, because tearing things down, unlike building them up, really is as easy as falling off a stump. It's blissfully simple to strike a savvy, sophisticated pose by attacking someone else's creations, but the old adage is right: Any fool can burn down a barn. Building one is something else again.
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You have the freedom to live and let live, to love and let love. Granting yourself that freedom is one of the healthiest, most constructive things you can do for yourself and the people who matter to you.
Martha Beck
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No one else can take risks for us, or face our losses on our behalf, or give us self-esteem. No one can spare us from life's slings and arrows, and when death comes, we meet it alone.
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Welcoming imperfection is the way to accomplish what perfectionism promises but never delivers. It gives us our best performance and genuine acceptance in the family of human -- and by that I mean imperfect -- beings.
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The end goal of all of this striving is to live joyfully, and that there are often more direct ways of achieving this than conforming to rigid standards set by social custom.
Martha Beck
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Question every thought that causes suffering and test it against your own sense of truth.
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This is the part of us that makes our brief, improbable little lives worth living: the ability to reach through our own isolation and find strength, and comfort, and warmth for and in each other. This is what human beings do. This is what we live for, the way horses live to run.
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Your individuality is the most valuable thing you have.
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Whenever you go somewhere that speaks to your soul, you are going home to yourself.
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