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Every instance of heartbreak can teach us powerful lessons about creating the kind of love we really want.

Martha Beck

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Martha Beck
Age: 61
Born: 1962
Born: November 29
Author
Journalist
Sociologist
Provo
Utah
Love
Healing
Lessons
Creating
Teach
Powerful
Every
Kind
Heartbreak
Really
Instance

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Your individuality is the most valuable thing you have.
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The way to find your own North Star is not to think or feel your way forward but to dissolve the thoughts and feeling that make you miserable. You don't have to learn your destiny--you already know it you just have to unlearn the thoughts that blind you to what you know.
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As much horror as we have always created, we are a species that keeps moving forward, seeing new sights in new ways, and enjoying the journey.
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Judgments that constrain your giving are the very demons that are keeping you from receiving.
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I majored in Chinese. I was never really good at Chinese but I really, really benefited from having been exposed to Asian philosophy early in my life.
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Loneliness is proof that your innate search for connection is intact.
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At times in my life, I have been utterly lonely. At other times, I've had disgusting infectious diseases. Try admitting these things in our culture.
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Criticism is an alluring substitute for creation, because tearing things down, unlike building them up, really is as easy as falling off a stump. It's blissfully simple to strike a savvy, sophisticated pose by attacking someone else's creations, but the old adage is right: Any fool can burn down a barn. Building one is something else again.
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I want you to notice is that-right here, right now-you’re okay. You may be in pain, you may be in fear, you may be in grief. But you’re here, you’re surviving this moment is okay.
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Every day brings new choices.
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Hopeful thinking can get you out of your fear zone and into your appreciation zone.
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If a problem looks difficult, relax. If it looks impossible, relax even more. Then begin encouraging small changes, putting just enough pressure on yourself to move one turtle step forward. Then rest, savor, celebrate. Then step again. You’ll find that slow is fast, gentle is powerful, and stillness moves mountains.
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Don’t worry that you’ve wasted time. Each moment -- no matter how frozen or confused -- was a useful and necessary lesson.
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Recurrent floods of sadness and anger gradually wash away the rubble of the defunct relationship, leaving only the bits of treasure: the remembered moments of real communion, a new understanding of your own mistakes, a clear picture of the dysfunctions you will never tolerate again.
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I've developed the habit of mentally listing things that make me optimistic about the future. I do it every day.
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Imagine the choices you'd make if you had no fear-of falling, of losing, of being alone, of disapproval.
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Play until it's time to rest, then rest until it's time to play.
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The past doesn’t exist except as a memory, a mental story, and though past events aren’t changeable, your stories about them are. You can act now to transform the way you tell the story of your past, ultimately making it a stalwart protector of your future.
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Your first daily priority should be stillness, attention to what you really know and what you really feel.
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There has never been, and never will be, anyone who sees, thinks, or responds exactly the way you do. Whether you’re revolutionizing physics or making a quilt, you must display your differences to make a difference.
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