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Not getting our needs fulfilled is painful - but it's a sweet pain, not suffering, which is what comes from life-alienated thinking and interpretation.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
Life
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Never connect yourself with the other person's pain. Just hear their need. Leave yourself out of the other person's feelings and needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Our goal is to create a quality of empathic connection that allows everyone's needs to be met.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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As radical as it may seem, it is possible to do things only out of play. I believe that to the degree that we engage moment by moment in the playfulness of enriching life- motivated solely by the desire for its enrichment- to that degree are we being compassionate with ourselves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Praise and reward create a system of extrinsic motivations for behavior. Children (and adults) end up taking action in order to receive the praise or rewards.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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People have been trained to criticize, insult, and otherwise communicate in ways that create distance among people.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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NVC helps us connect with each other and ourselves in a way that allows our natural compassion to flourish.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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My anger tells me firstly that there's a need of mine that's not getting met.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Intellectual understanding blocks empathy.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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With empathy we don't direct, we follow. Don't just do something, be there.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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NVC requires us to be continually conscious of the beauty within ourselves and other people.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Also, think about your intentionality - are you getting lost in the method? or coming from the intentionality, the purpose? You don't want to do the mechanics without the consciousness.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Plans to exact retribution are never going to make us safer.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We want people to change because they see better ways of meeting their needs at less cost, not because of fear that we're going to punish them, or 'guilt' them if they don't. This applies to ourselves as well.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Every moment each human being is doing the best we know at that moment to meet our needs. We never do anything that is not in the service of a need, there is no conflict on our planet at the level of needs. We all have the same needs. The problem is in strategies for meeting the needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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It's never what people do that makes us angry it's what we tell ourselves about what they did.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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With every choice you make, be conscious of what need it serves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Whether I praise or criticize someone's action, I imply that I am their judge, that I'm engaged in rating them or what they have done.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I don't think you can have an authentic connection when one person is diagnosing the other.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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If we ask two questions, we will see that punishment never works. First: What do we want the other person to do? Second: What do we want the other person's reasons to be for doing as we request?
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Needs are the expression of life through us.
Marshall B. Rosenberg