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In a Giraffe institution, the head nurse job would be to serve the nurses, not to control them. Teachers are there to serve the students, not control them.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Blaming and punishing others are superficial expressions of anger.
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Children need far more than basic skills in reading, writing, and math, as important as those might be. Children also need to learn how to think for themselves, how to find meaning in what they learn, and how to work and live together.
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As long as I think I 'should' do it, I'll resist it, even if I want very much to do it.
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Regardless of our many differences, we all have the same needs. What differs is the strategy for fulfilling these needs.
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Punishment also includes judgmental labeling and the withholding of privileges.
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Every criticism, judgment, diagnosis, and expression of anger is the tragic expression of an unmet need.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Two things distinguish nonviolent actions from violent actions. First, you don't see an enemy and second, your intention is not to make the other side suffer.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Praise and reward create a system of extrinsic motivations for behavior. Children (and adults) end up taking action in order to receive the praise or rewards.
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We only feel dehumanized when we get trapped in the derogatory images of other people or thoughts of wrongness about ourselves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I think that there is a problem with rewards and consequences because in the long run, they rarely work in the ways we hope. In fact, they are likely to backfire.
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The only time a message (label) can scare us is if we think there is such a thing, and that such a thing is a disgrace.
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Getting in touch with unmet needs is important to the healing process.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I wouldn't expect someone who's been injured to hear my side until they felt that I had fully understood the depth of their pain.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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All people ever say is: THANK YOU (a celebration of life) and PLEASE (an opportunity to make life more wonderful).
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NVC is founded on language and communication skills that strengthen our ability to remain human, even under trying conditions.
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To be able to hear our own feelings and needs and to empathize with them can free us from depression.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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There are the two main reasons we don't get our needs met. First, we don't know how to express our needs to begin with and second if we do, we forget to put a clear request after it, or we use vague words like appreciate, listen, recognize, know, be real, and stuff like that.
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Expressing our vulnerability can help resolve conflicts.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Anger is a signal that you're distracted by judgmental or punitive thinking, and that some precious need of yours is being ignored.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Our ability to offer empathy can allow us to stay vulnerable, defuse potential violence, help us hear the word 'no' without taking it as a rejection, revive lifeless conversation, and even hear the feelings and needs expressed through silence.
Marshall B. Rosenberg