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Empathy: Emptying our mind and listening with our whole being

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
Whole
Mind
Emptying
Empathy
Communication
Listening

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Blaming and punishing others are superficial expressions of anger.
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As long as I think I 'should' do it, I'll resist it, even if I want very much to do it.
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I believe that the most joyful and intrinsic motivation human beings have for taking any action is the desire to meet our needs and the needs of others.
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Our survival as a species depends on our ability to recognize that our well-being and the well-being of others are in fact one and the same.
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The first step in healing is to put the focus on what's alive now, not what happened in the past.
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All that has been integrated into NVC has been known for centuries about consciousness, language, communication skills, and use of power that enable us to maintain a perspective of empathy for ourselves and others, even under trying conditions.
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The most dangerous of all behaviors may consist of doing things 'because we're supposed to.
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I think that there is a problem with rewards and consequences because in the long run, they rarely work in the ways we hope. In fact, they are likely to backfire.
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I try never to hear what another person thinks of me. I enjoy life a lot more when I spend as little time as possible hearing or thinking about what other people think about me. I go to the needs behind the thoughts. Then I'm in a different world.
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Our ability to offer empathy can allow us to stay vulnerable, defuse potential violence, help us hear the word 'no' without taking it as a rejection, revive lifeless conversation, and even hear the feelings and needs expressed through silence.
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NVC is a reminder to focus our attention where we are most likely to get our needs met.
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Avoid 'shoulding' on others and yourself!
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They have most likely said it because they have an unmet need.
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When we focus on clarifying what is being observed, felt, and needed rather than on diagnosing and judging, we discover the depth of our own compassion.
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Empathy gives you the ability to enjoy another person's pain.
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Every moment each human being is doing the best we know at that moment to meet our needs. We never do anything that is not in the service of a need, there is no conflict on our planet at the level of needs. We all have the same needs. The problem is in strategies for meeting the needs.
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Fix-it jackals can't wait to fix it, because they don't know how to enjoy pain. And until you learn how to enjoy pain, you can't enjoy intimacy.
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It's never what people do that makes us angry it's what we tell ourselves about what they did.
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It's harder to empathize with those who appear to possess more power, status, or resources.
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Getting in touch with unmet needs is important to the healing process.
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