Quote

Don't get addicted to your requests. Your objective is needs, not requests. Because then it becomes a demand.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
Demand
Becomes
Needs
Requests
Addicted
Request
Objective
Objectives
Communication

More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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The punitive use of force tends to generate hostility and to reinforce resistance to the very behavior we are seeking.
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Plans to exact retribution are never going to make us safer.
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Avoid 'shoulding' on others and yourself!
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We recognize that real educational reform is essential if today's and tomorrow's children are to live in a more peaceful, just, and sustainable world.
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It may be most difficult to empathize with those we are closest to.
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There are the two main reasons we don't get our needs met. First, we don't know how to express our needs to begin with and second if we do, we forget to put a clear request after it, or we use vague words like appreciate, listen, recognize, know, be real, and stuff like that.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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People heal from their pain when they have an authentic connection with another human being.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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As long as I think I 'should' do it, I'll resist it, even if I want very much to do it.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Clinical training in psychoanalysis has a deficit. It teaches how to sit and think about what a person is saying and how to interpret it intellectually, but not how to be fully present to this person.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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If we ask two questions, we will see that punishment never works. First: What do we want the other person to do? Second: What do we want the other person's reasons to be for doing as we request?
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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If the other persons behavior is not in harmony with my own needs, the more I empathize with them and their needs, the more likely I am to get me own needs met.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Judgments of others contribute to self-fulfilling prophecies.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Life-Enriching Education: an education that prepares children to learn throughout their lives, relate well to others, and themselves, be creative, flexible, and venturesome, and have empathy not only for their immediate kin but for all of humankind.
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Never connect yourself with the other person's pain. Just hear their need. Leave yourself out of the other person's feelings and needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Empathy lies in our ability to be present without opinion.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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What bores the listener bores the speaker too.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Four D's of Disconnection: 1. Diagnosis (judgment, analysis, criticism, comparison) 2. Denial of Responsibility 3. Demand 4. 'Deserve' oriented language.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Enemy images are the main reason conflicts don't get resolved.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We can never make anyone do anything against their will without enormous consequences.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Focusing on the unmet need (not the judgment) is more likely to get the need met.
Marshall B. Rosenberg