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As soon as you say, are you feeling X because I ... Then the Jackal starts to salivate because he can educate the person that he's the cause of his pain.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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If we ask two questions, we will see that punishment never works. First: What do we want the other person to do? Second: What do we want the other person's reasons to be for doing as we request?
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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By maintaining our attention on what's going on within others, we offer them a chance to fully explore and express their interior selves. We would stem this flow if we were to shift attention too quickly either to their request or to our own desire to express ourselves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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People have been trained to criticize, insult, and otherwise communicate in ways that create distance among people.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We are designed for Giving
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We need empathy to give empathy.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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NVC suggests behind every action, however ineffective, tragic, violent, or abhorrent to us, is an attempt to meet a need.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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The number one reason that we don't get our needs met, we don't express them. We express judgments. If we do express needs, the number two reasons we don't our needs met, we don't make clear requests.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We give empathy to others for our own benefit.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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As long as I think I 'should' do it, I'll resist it, even if I want very much to do it.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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A need is life seeking expression within us.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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In a Giraffe institution, the head nurse job would be to serve the nurses, not to control them. Teachers are there to serve the students, not control them.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When you need empathy, you cannot give empathy.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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If you are a jackal, you will try to reassure. Jackals try to fix people in pain. They can't stand pain, but make matters worse by trying to get rid of it. Put on giraffe ears. Try to hear what they are feeling and needing.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Compliments and praise, for their part, are tragic expressions of fulfilled needs
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Whether I praise or criticize someone's action, I imply that I am their judge, that I'm engaged in rating them or what they have done.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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People heal from their pain when they have an authentic connection with another human being.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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As radical as it may seem, it is possible to do things only out of play. I believe that to the degree that we engage moment by moment in the playfulness of enriching life- motivated solely by the desire for its enrichment- to that degree are we being compassionate with ourselves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Enemy images are the main reason conflicts don't get resolved.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When we listen for feelings and needs - we can see that people who seem like monsters are simply human beings whose language and behavior sometimes keep us from seeing their humanness.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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In NVC, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests.
Marshall B. Rosenberg