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As soon as you say, are you feeling X because I ... Then the Jackal starts to salivate because he can educate the person that he's the cause of his pain.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
Feeling
Jackal
Pain
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Persons
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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They have most likely said it because they have an unmet need.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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In our culture, most of us have been trained to ignore our own wants and to discount our needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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In NVC, no matter what words others may use to express themselves, we simply listen for their observations, feelings, needs, and requests.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Praise and reward create a system of extrinsic motivations for behavior. Children (and adults) end up taking action in order to receive the praise or rewards.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When we listen for feelings and needs - we can see that people who seem like monsters are simply human beings whose language and behavior sometimes keep us from seeing their humanness.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Never connect yourself with the other person's pain. Just hear their need. Leave yourself out of the other person's feelings and needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Every criticism, judgment, diagnosis, and expression of anger is the tragic expression of an unmet need.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When people hear needs, it provokes compassion. When people hear diagnoses, it provokes defensiveness and attack.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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By maintaining our attention on what's going on within others, we offer them a chance to fully explore and express their interior selves. We would stem this flow if we were to shift attention too quickly either to their request or to our own desire to express ourselves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Anger is a signal that you're distracted by judgmental or punitive thinking, and that some precious need of yours is being ignored.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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The only time a message (label) can scare us is if we think there is such a thing, and that such a thing is a disgrace.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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With every choice you make, be conscious of what need it serves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Empathizing with someone's 'no' protects us from taking it personally.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Four D's of Disconnection: 1. Diagnosis (judgment, analysis, criticism, comparison) 2. Denial of Responsibility 3. Demand 4. 'Deserve' oriented language.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Our survival as a species depends on our ability to recognize that our well-being and the well-being of others are in fact one and the same.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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NVC self-forgiveness: connecting with the need we were trying to meet when we took the action that we now regret.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Use anger as a wake-up call to unmet needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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The punitive use of force tends to generate hostility and to reinforce resistance to the very behavior we are seeking.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Judgments of others contribute to self-fulfilling prophecies.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Never hear what a jackal-speaking person thinks, especially what they think about you.
Marshall B. Rosenberg