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The objective of Nonviolent Communication is not to change people and their behavior in order to get our way: it is to establish relationships based on honesty and empathy, which will eventually fulfill everyone's needs.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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When we focus on clarifying what is being observed, felt, and needed rather than on diagnosing and judging, we discover the depth of our own compassion.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I don't think you can have an authentic connection when one person is diagnosing the other.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Judgments of others contribute to self-fulfilling prophecies.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I wouldn't expect someone who's been injured to hear my side until they felt that I had fully understood the depth of their pain.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Four D's of Disconnection: 1. Diagnosis (judgment, analysis, criticism, comparison) 2. Denial of Responsibility 3. Demand 4. 'Deserve' oriented language.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I try never to hear what another person thinks of me. I enjoy life a lot more when I spend as little time as possible hearing or thinking about what other people think about me. I go to the needs behind the thoughts. Then I'm in a different world.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Praise and reward create a system of extrinsic motivations for behavior. Children (and adults) end up taking action in order to receive the praise or rewards.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We are designed for Giving
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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The punitive use of force tends to generate hostility and to reinforce resistance to the very behavior we are seeking.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Nonviolent Communication is a way of keeping our consciousness tuned in moment by moment to that beauty within ourselves and others, and not saying anything that we think might in any way tarnish people's consciousness of their own beauty.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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As long as I think I 'should' do it, I'll resist it, even if I want very much to do it.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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With empathy, I'm fully with them, not full of them — that's sympathy.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Don't get addicted to your requests. Your objective is needs, not requests. Because then it becomes a demand.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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As soon as you say, are you feeling X because I ... Then the Jackal starts to salivate because he can educate the person that he's the cause of his pain.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Empathy lies in our ability to be present without opinion.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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You're going to lose it when you follow the world feel with the words because I think. Any time you are thinking, your chance of getting what you need is greatly decreased, especially when you follow the word think with the word you. I predict you won't only not get heard, but I predict a defensive aggressive reaction.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I find that my cultural conditioning leads me to focus attention on places where I am unlikely to get what I want. I developed NVC as a way to train my attention-to shine the light of consciousness-on places that have the potential to yield what I am seeking.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Criticism, analysis, and insults are tragic expressions of unmet needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We are compassionate with ourselves when we are able to embrace all parts of ourselves and recognize the needs and values expressed by each part.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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It may be most difficult to empathize with those we are closest to.
Marshall B. Rosenberg