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You'll find people less threatening if you hear what they're needing rather than what they're thinking about you.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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NVC is founded on language and communication skills that strengthen our ability to remain human, even under trying conditions.
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To be able to hear our own feelings and needs and to empathize with them can free us from depression.
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Remember that whatever anyone does, it is an effort to meet a need.
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People have been trained to criticize, insult, and otherwise communicate in ways that create distance among people.
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In our culture, most of us have been trained to ignore our own wants and to discount our needs.
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Instead of playing the game Making Life Wonderful, we often play the game called Who's Right. Do you know that game? It's a game where everybody loses.
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Fix-it jackals can't wait to fix it, because they don't know how to enjoy pain. And until you learn how to enjoy pain, you can't enjoy intimacy.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When we express our needs indirectly through the use of evaluations, interpretations, and images, others are likely to hear criticism. When people hear anything that sounds like criticism, they tend to invest their energy in self-defense or counterattack. It's important that when we address somebody that we're clear what we want back.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We're not taught to think in terms of needs. We don't make nice dead people when we're in touch with needs. Domination structures cannot maintain themselves when citizens are educated to be alive.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Empathy lies in our ability to be present without opinion.
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The number one rule of our training is empathy before education.
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The objective of Nonviolent Communication is not to change people and their behavior in order to get our way: it is to establish relationships based on honesty and empathy, which will eventually fulfill everyone's needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We use NVC to evaluate ourselves in ways that engender growth rather than self-hatred.
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It's never what people do that makes us angry it's what we tell ourselves about what they did.
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Not getting our needs fulfilled is painful - but it's a sweet pain, not suffering, which is what comes from life-alienated thinking and interpretation.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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What bores the listener bores the speaker too.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Expressing our vulnerability can help resolve conflicts.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Judgments of others contribute to self-fulfilling prophecies.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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The number one reason that we don't get our needs met, we don't express them. We express judgments. If we do express needs, the number two reasons we don't our needs met, we don't make clear requests.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Fear of corporal punishment obscures children's awareness of the compassion underlying the parent's demands.
Marshall B. Rosenberg