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I think that there is a problem with rewards and consequences because in the long run, they rarely work in the ways we hope. In fact, they are likely to backfire.

Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Marshall B. Rosenberg
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More quotes by Marshall B. Rosenberg

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Understanding the other persons' needs does not mean you have to give up on your own needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I have tried to integrate the spirituality into the training in a way that meets my need not to destroy the beauty of it through abstract philosophizing.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When we listen for feelings and needs - we can see that people who seem like monsters are simply human beings whose language and behavior sometimes keep us from seeing their humanness.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Upset? Ask yourself what this person does that is a trigger for judging them?
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Fear of corporal punishment obscures children's awareness of the compassion underlying the parent's demands.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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My anger tells me firstly that there's a need of mine that's not getting met.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Some people use NVC to respond compassionately to themselves, some to create greater depth in their personal relationships, and still others to build effective relationships at work or in the political arena. Worldwide, NVC is used to mediate disputes and conflicts at all levels.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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With empathy, I'm fully with them, not full of them — that's sympathy.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When people hear needs, it provokes compassion. When people hear diagnoses, it provokes defensiveness and attack.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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As radical as it may seem, it is possible to do things only out of play. I believe that to the degree that we engage moment by moment in the playfulness of enriching life- motivated solely by the desire for its enrichment- to that degree are we being compassionate with ourselves.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Never connect yourself with the other person's pain. Just hear their need. Leave yourself out of the other person's feelings and needs.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Every criticism, judgment, diagnosis, and expression of anger is the tragic expression of an unmet need.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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The most important use of NVC may be in developing self-compassion.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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All people ever say is: THANK YOU (a celebration of life) and PLEASE (an opportunity to make life more wonderful).
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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A need is life seeking expression within us.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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What others do may be the stimulus of our feelings, but never the cause.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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When we focus on clarifying what is being observed, felt, and needed rather than on diagnosing and judging, we discover the depth of our own compassion.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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I believe that the most joyful and intrinsic motivation human beings have for taking any action is the desire to meet our needs and the needs of others.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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Fix-it jackals can't wait to fix it, because they don't know how to enjoy pain. And until you learn how to enjoy pain, you can't enjoy intimacy.
Marshall B. Rosenberg
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We want people to change because they see better ways of meeting their needs at less cost, not because of fear that we're going to punish them, or 'guilt' them if they don't. This applies to ourselves as well.
Marshall B. Rosenberg